


The Escape

by Anifan1



Series: Escape [2]
Category: Animorphs (TV), Animorphs - Katherine A. Applegate
Genre: AU, Adoption, Angst, Brothers, Family, Fluff, Gen, Hiding, Hugs, Hurt/Comfort, Involuntary infestation, Love (Familial), PTSD, Rescue, Self-Sacrifice, Siblings, Trauma, Yeerks, dating your (adopted?) cousin, hosts, no nothlits, solutions
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-16
Updated: 2020-07-13
Packaged: 2021-03-03 02:33:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 30,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24207496
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anifan1/pseuds/Anifan1
Summary: Jake and the others manage to free Tom during their first raid on the Yeerk Pool. Now what? How the series might have gone.
Relationships: Jake Berenson/Cassie (Animorphs), Rachel (Animorphs)/Tobias (Animorphs)
Series: Escape [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1936960
Comments: 40
Kudos: 24





	1. The Invasion Revamp

My name is Jake. I can't tell you my last name, or where I live. I wish I could, because maybe, then you could help. Or send help. But, if the wrong people read this, the ones with alien slugs living inside their heads...we're doomed. If we're not already doomed.

Yeah, alien slugs. You heard that right. Basically, this planet is being invaded by an alien race called Yeerks. If you saw a picture of one, you wouldn't see much in the way of danger. They just look like large slugs in their natural form. Big, grey green slugs. The problem is, they're parasites. Like ticks. Leeches. Unlike those parasites, though, they don't just attach themselves to your body and make you sick for awhile.

They enter your brain. Wrap themselves around the crevices, and take control. Worse, they have access to your memory, so they know everything about you. Once they take over, you're a slave in your mind. You're helpless. You're a Controller.

An Andalite named Elfangor warned us about them. He was dying, but he was able to give us the power to morph-to become any animal we touched-before a Yeerk called Visser Three ended his life. Literally, he morphed into this terrifying creature and ate him. The Yeerks mean business with their enemies.

So, until the other Andalites return to this planet, me and my four other friends are the only ones with the power to fight the Yeerks.

One of the useful things that Elfangor was able to tell us before he died was that Yeerks can't just stay wrapped around the brains of their hosts forever. Every three days, they have to leave their hosts, to swim around in this thing called a Yeerk Pool, which is where they soak up Kandrona rays and other nutrients, in their natural form. So, for a couple of hours every three days, their hosts are free to move around on their own. The involuntary hosts, the ones who don't want them there, are locked in cages. They can scream, rage, curse, and cry all they want. The voluntary hosts get to hang out in a nicer area, with TV and food. They actually want their Yeerks in their heads.

Right after we met Elfangor, Marco figured out that my older brother, Tom, was a Controller. He'd been kind of distant ever since he started getting involved in this group called The Sharing. It stunk, because we'd always been really close until then. We found out for sure that he was a Controller, that The Sharing was a front to gain voluntary hosts for the Yeerks, when we all attended this Sharing barbecue and the "full members" disappeared to have their own meeting. I morphed my dog, Homer, and followed them. I heard Tom, well, his Yeerk, tell the other Yeerks that if they didn't manage to infest me, they'd just kill me.

Earlier in the evening, I had hoped that The Sharing was just a group like Boy Scouts or something. It wasn't hard to imagine, then. Everyone seemed happy, normal, hanging around, playing games, and eating good food. Then, when Tom was telling me about becoming more involved in the ranks of the group, his face just changed. It was only for a few seconds, if that, but it was like another scared person was looking at me.

I knew, then, that Tom had been taken by the Yeerks.

One good thing had come from listening to Tom's Yeerk telling the others that he planned to kill me. He let it slip that he'd fed recently, and was planning to feed again on Monday night. After the barbecue ended, we decided to attack the Yeerk Pool on Monday.

Our first mission: attack the Yeerk Pool, and free Tom.

Looking back, I wouldn't exactly say that everything went according to plan. First of all, we were completely new at fighting alien slugs. Obviously, we had no idea what we were in for. Oh, sure, we knew that we needed fire power to do some massive damage, which meant acquiring animals that could do more than bite someone's leg or scratch them. That is, we needed battle morphs. That was the easy part, really. Cassie's mom worked at this place called The Gardens, which not only had these really cool amusement park rides, but also tons of scary animals. We just needed to get close enough to them to touch them, to acquire them. Then, we could do some serious damage with these morphs.

If the animals didn't go into a trance when you acquire them, we would have been dead meat before we even entered the Yeerk Pool. Fortunately, the Andalite technology had that perk, so were were ready with some serious firepower for our first battle.

When we entered the Yeerk Pool, the slugs were totally unaware for what we were capable of. We totally slaughtered a bunch of Hork-Bajir Controller guards who were in charge of dragging people to the Yeerk Pool before they even knew what had hit them. We broke open some of the cages. Including Tom's.

We could have freed more people, but then, Visser Three arrived, and we knew that things were heading south. If our morphs were dangerous, I knew they were nothing like Visser Three's. He'd morphed this crazy creature from another planet to eat Elfangor, and he was in the process of morphing this other alien when I knew we had to grab Tom and cut our losses.

Tom couldn't morph, but he still wanted to fight. At my command, Marco, full gorilla, grabbed him and placed him on Cassie's back. We were gone before he could do much about it except scream and curse at us.

I wasn't sure how many others escaped. I hoped there were some. I hoped that we would be back, to free more people.

At the moment, though, all that mattered was that we had Tom.

He was free.

We ran-except for Tobias, who flew ahead of us. Tom had finally stopped screaming at us for tearing him away from the battle.

I wasn't sure what to do next. Head home seemed like the best option, but what if the Yeerks were waiting?

We only had two hours in a morph, so this was just a risk we needed to take.

(Demorph!) I shouted at them, once we were far away from the Yeerk Pool, and it was clear that no one was following us.

Everyone obeyed me. They'd made me their leader before the battle began, so they listened to me, now.

Poor Tom started throwing up when he saw us start to change. I wasn't sure if it was because the process was really that gross, or he was reacting to everything that had happened to him.

Probably both.

When we emerged in our human forms, clothed in only our morphing outfits, Tom just stared at us. Then, he hurled himself at me, and I wasn't sure if he was going to slug me for running head first into a battle, or pull me into a hug.

It ended up being a massive hug. I was relieved, more than relieved, but I would have taken being beaten up by my older brother (not that he'd ever really done that before) in exchange for seeing him free from those alien slugs.

I squeezed him back, and we just stayed like that for at least five minutes. Finally, Tom let go, and gave us all the once over.

"You're gonna have to tell me everything," he told us, shaking his head in complete disbelief.

"We can't just stay out here all night!" Rachel protested, hands on her hips. "Anyway, besides you, we don't know who we can trust. Anyone could be a Controller."

Tom nodded his head, slowly. "Yeah. I know a lot who are, but not everyone." Then, brightening, he added, "But, I know some who aren't. Like our parents. Midget, they're safe."

"You're sure?" I asked, and I could feel my voice cracking.

Tom laughed, giving me a light punch on the arm. "Am I sure that our parents aren't Controllers? When I was one? When my Yeerk would have liked nothing better than to infest our family and make his life a hell of a lot easier?"

I had to laugh. "Stupid question. I get it."

But Tom just shook his head, and then gave my shoulder a squeeze. "No. Paranoid, maybe. Which is good. You're all gonna need to be. But yeah, for now, they're not Controllers." Then, Tom turned to Rachel. "Rach, your mom isn't one, either. Marco, neither's your dad. But...you probably guessed that."

Marco had lost his mom in a boating accident almost two years ago. His dad kind of lost it since then. He had a great job, before. Now, he worked part time as a janitor. Not that there was anything wrong with being a janitor, but Marco told me it was because he couldn't be around people anymore. They'd moved to this small apartment, and were barely making ends meet.

So, yeah. Marco's dad wouldn't have joined The Sharing.

"Well. That's something," Marco sighed. "At least."

"What do we do now?" I asked Tom.

Okay, yeah. I was the leader, but Tom was still my big brother. Besides, however long he'd been infested by the Yeerks, he had to have more information than the rest of us. Which we would need. Also, he was free, now, but I was starting to see that keeping him free would be a challenge. I mean, the Yeerks knew who he was. What would keep them from grabbing him and infesting him again?

Also, I realized, Tom knew who we were. If they infested him again, we were done for.

Tom must have been thinking something similar. He put his arms on my shoulders, staring me in the eyes.

"We have to tell our parents-just our parents. Then, we have to fake my death," he explained. "If they get me again...Midget, then, it's all over. We'd be worse than dead."

I nodded, believing him, then turned to the others. "Okay. Everyone else can head home. Get some sleep." Before they could protest, I raised my hand. "Look, it would be one thing if people saw Rachel or Marco come into my house, but a whole group of people? This late? That could be weird. And, if something happens before we can figure out what to do with Tom, and the wrong people find out...the ones with slugs in their heads..." I trailed off.

"He's right," Marco spoke up. "Jake's parents are free, and, at least right now, they're the only ones who can know the truth."

"That's right." I swallowed. "It will just be for tonight. But, everyone else has to stay out of this before we do damage control with Tom. We can't be seen together as a group."

Rachel, Cassie, and Tobias kind of nodded. We said quick goodbyes, and Rachel gave Tom a quick half hug.

"Tom. Stay safe, okay?" she told him. Turning to me, she added, "Both of you. Don't do anything stupid."

"Don't worry, Rachel. We'll watch out for each other," Tom promised. Pulling an arm around me, he added, almost teasingly, "Come on, Midget. Let's prepare to get grounded for life."

It wasn't past our curfew by the time we arrived, or, at least, not past Tom's. There was an unwritten rule in our house that if I was with Tom and past my curfew, it was okay. Not that this had happened all that much in the last year. So, when our parents saw us, they just nodded, said hello, and went back to the TV show they were watching in the living room.

Once we were inside and away from our parents, Tom pulled me into my room.

"First things first. You better get dressed," he ordered, nodding at my morphing outfit. "Seriously, Midget, what gives? You look like you just came out of the ballet stage or something."

"Yeah, I know." I pulled out a t-shirt and pair of jeans from my closet, then put them on. "So far, we've only figured out to morph skin tight clothes. Andalites don't wear clothes, and the morphing technology..."

Tom raised his hands in mock surrender. "Fair enough. At least, you're not naked. You just look...weird. We're going to need to figure out how to morph normal clothes soon. Especially when it's fifty degrees outside."

I nodded. "It hasn't exactly been the biggest priority. Saving you..."

I trailed off.

Tom nodded, pulled me into another hug, and then stood back, studying me. "You're barefoot."

I sighed. "Yeah. We haven't figured out how to morph shoes, either."

Or, rather, if we could morph shoes.

Another nod from Tom. I took a seat on my bed, and Tom sat next to me. For a minute, we were quiet, probably digesting everything that had happened.

"I gotta ask. How long have you been able to do this?" Tom asked, his voice gentle.

"Um...less than a week," I answered, shaking my head a little. "You know when Elfangor got eaten up by Visser Three? He gave us the morphing technology minutes before."

I swallowed hard, the memory still vivid in my mind. Tom pulled me into another hug.

"I gotta say, Jake. I've never thought of you as weak, but you're a lot tougher than I would have given you credit for." I managed a grin. Then, he gestured to himself, and his voice changed. Almost cold. "I'd still be a slave in my head if it weren't for you."

"Wasn't just me, Tom. It was all of us," I pointed out. Then, staring at him and swallowing a lump in my throat, I added, "We have to keep you free."

He nodded, and wrapped an arm around me. Must have known I needed the support.

"Okay. I'm free, for now, and you guys are all safe. But, we need a game plan to keep it that way. Any ideas?" he asked me, his voice not much louder than a whisper.

"I guess, since Mom and Dad are free, I figure we need to tell them everything. They won't believe us, so I'll morph in front of them." I forced a laugh. "They'll have to believe us, then. After that?" I shrugged. "Tom, you're sixteen. If you ran away..."

"No. Being underage aside, they'd find me in a second," Tom sighed. "Even if I went to live with Grandpa G., Temrash 252-that slug who was in my head-he knows everything about me. He'll tell them everything. The Yeerks won't let me, or anyone, stay free. It's possible that they'd out and kill me, but I'm a good and young host body, and I have a family who would notice if I suddenly died or disappeared. No. Most likely, they'd infest me again. With him, or someone else just as awful."

"You're not gonna go back to that, Tom." I grabbed his arm, held it tight. "I won't let that happen."

"Hey." Tom took my other hand in his, and squeezed it. "You've done great. We made it this far. Anyway, between us and Mom and Dad, we can figure out a way to keep me alive and free."

I nodded, feeling more hopeful. "Okay. Then, let's go tell them."

They were still watching TV in the living room when we found them. A part of me wanted to hang onto that moment of seeing them together, happy and normal.

You know. Before we were about to ruin their life.

Tom and I stayed close to each other the whole time. I told them the whole story, starting with the construction site. Then, before they could really react, and announce that I was grounded for life, I began to morph Homer.

Looking back, maybe I could have asked Tom if I could acquire him. He probably would have said it was okay. Morphing my older brother would have been weird for everyone, but a lot less freaky than me turning into my dog.

On the other hand, turning into the tiger or iguana would have seriously freaked everyone out, so maybe Homer was my best option.

I was starting to get used to morphing. I was ready for the fur, the happiness, the desire to run and play.

This time, though, I think the real Homer probably reacted to my changing into his mirror image before my parents did.

"It's okay, Homer," I heard Tom tell him, giving him a few pats on the back.

The instincts were strong. Before I could stop myself, I began to bark at Homer, then moved next to Tom. I wanted him to pet me instead. I was sure that, had I been human, I would have seen him roll his eyes at me, but my older brother turned his attention to me, and began to pet me.

After basking in the dog happiness for a few minutes, I forced myself to concentrate on the human me. Not enough to demorph, just to remember that I was Jake and my parents were probably beside themselves.

(Mom, Dad, it's okay. It's me, Jake,) I assured them, moving away from Tom, and trotting up to them.

"J-Jake?" my mom asked, and I could hear her disbelief.

(Yep, still me. I'm talking to you with my thoughts, directly into your head. That's how it works when you're in a morph,) I explained. (Dad, you can hear me, too, right?)

"Yes, Jake, I can hear you," my dad answered, but his tone was no less flabbergasted than my mom's.

"I can hear you, too, Jake," Tom added, patting me on the top of my head, and I swore, I could hear some amusement in his voice.

"Can you turn back?" Dad asked. "You're-you're not going to be stuck like that, permanently?"

(Don't worry, Dad. I can stay in any morph for up to two hours before I get stuck,) I explained, even though I was sure I'd told them this before. (I can change into other animals, too!)

"Well, maybe you should change back, now, anyway," Dad suggested. "Just in case."

(Okay,) I agreed.

I focused on my human body, and a few minutes later, I was fully human. My shirt and jeans were on the ground, though. I picked them up and put them back on.

"We can only morph skin tight clothing," I explained. "Other stuff just falls off. Or, gets shredded, in some cases."

"You see, Andalites don't wear clothes," Tom added. "And they designed the technology for themselves, not humans."

I got the sense that Tom knew a little more about this than I did. Given that he'd been a Controller for-months, maybe?-he had to know more about the Andalites than I did.

Probably, anyway.

With a kind of queasy feeling, I realized that he definitely knew more about the Yeerks than any of us did.

We all just kind sat down on the couch at the same time. Tom and me in the middle, between our parents. They still looked like they could barely believe what was going on.

Tom noticed this, too.

"Mom, Dad, we don't have much time. Yeah, I escaped from the Yeerk Pool, thanks to Jake and his friends, but they're going to be after me before long. I probably don't even have three days. I-I need to be out of the picture," he told them. "They need to think I'm dead."

Dad was the first to understand what Tom meant. "Tom, did you take my car to the Yeerk Pool?"

Tom nodded. "Yeah. It's still at the school. I can't-"

"No, from what you told me, it's not safe for you to go back for it." Dad stood up. "It's not too far of a walk. I'll handle it. Make it look like you had an accident." He turned to Mom. "Jean, honey, we're going to be a one car household for the time being."

Mom managed a little laugh. "That's the least of our problems."

"Tomorrow, I'll tell the police that you didn't come home. They'll find the car, or the remains, on the highway, right above the river," Dad determined. "There won't be a body."

"I should do it," I spoke up. "I can morph, Dad. If something happens to you..."

Dad looked like he was about to protest, but Tom spoke up. "Jake's right. You're going to have injuries after that kind of stunt. At least. The Yeerks will figure it out."

"Neither of us are letting our thirteen year old son in front of the wheel!" Mom yelled. "Much less attempt a stunt that could result in him killing himself!"

"But, you'll let Dad?" Tom shot back. "No way! Mom, think about it. Midget can morph out, but Dad can't. Look, I don't want either of you to die, but..."

"Tom's right," I added, swallowing hard. "Anyway, I risked my life once today. I can do it again."

Before my parents could stop me, I ran out of the living room, and then, out of the house.

Looking back, I was kind of surprised I managed it. For one thing, I only had three morphs, and neither were all that great for surviving a car crash. It wasn't like I could change into a fly or something. There wasn't time to acquire anything else. Of my available morphs, I ended up using the lizard. I kept the window open as I drove, and focusing on the changes just before aiming the car at the edge of the road.

It helped that it was late at night. There was a lot less traffic than during the day.

I was pretty sure I was going to die before I completed the morph, much less before my body hit the pavement. Lizards are pretty tough creatures, though. Or, maybe, I was just that determined to survive, and to keep my family safe.

I demorphed to human, and then walked home. I could have morphed Homer and gotten back quicker, but I was already exhausted from morphing so much in one day. Would it get easier over time? I sure hoped so.

Everyone was waiting for me in the kitchen.

Dad pulled me into the biggest bear hug ever, then gave me a punch on the shoulder.

"Jake, don't ever do that again, okay?" he practically yelled.

Tom nodded at Dad, then pulled me into another massive hug, almost breaking all of my ribs.

Not that I was complaining.

Mom also hugged me, but not before telling me that I was grounded for life. We all knew that this would be impossible to implement, for various reasons, but I just nodded and pretended to look ashamed of myself.

The next day, Dad called the police in a panic. I heard him tell the story we'd agreed on the night before. After I got back. Tom had gone out that night and hadn't returned home. No, there hadn't been any arguments or fights. No, he'd never done anything like this before. All Dad knew was that he'd left after dinner, saying that he had plans. Dad had assumed that he had a Sharing meeting. After all, he'd been involved with the group for several months, and that's where he spent most of his time. Yes, he'd taken his car with him. Yes, Dad could provide the license number for the car.

The following day, the police stopped by to explain what had happened. At least, their assessment. Tom had been driving back from the Sharing meeting, and his car fell off the side of the road. Given the good reputation of The Sharing, it was highly unlikely that Tom had been drinking. It was simply a tragic accident. Dad's car had crashed into the river, totaled beyond repair. There was no body to be recovered, but given the speed of the crash and the impact of the hit, there was no way that Tom would have survived.

They were truly sorry for our loss.

We had a funeral for Tom a few days later. Most of the kids in his grade were there, as well as a large number of people from The Sharing. Plus, of course, Rachel and her family. Everyone said what a tragic loss it was, for someone so young and with such a promising future. Everyone was mourning with us during this horrible time of our grief.

A few weeks later, Tom became a distant memory. Just another teenage death. Tragic, horrible for his family, but life went on. The Sharing sent people to invite us to meetings, to help us grieve, but I don't think anyone was really surprised when my family responded with a polite but tense "thanks but no thanks".

After all, Tom had died on his way back from a Sharing meeting. It was hardly their fault, but it was also not a ringing endorsement for the group.

Right after Tom "died", we decided that he'd need to move to the basement. After all, we couldn't risk a dead teenager being seen by neighbors. At least, we had a finished basement. It wasn't a bad place to spend time. There was a TV, a huge couch with those portable cushioned that made it a comfortable bed. A fridge and freezer for snacks. Shelves filled with books and movies. Really, it was a cool hangout place for any teenager.

Being completely underground, there were no windows. Which meant, as long as Tom stayed quiet when people were over, and they didn't go down to the basement, he wouldn't be caught.

"You can come upstairs if you need to, but try to keep it to at night," Mom promised. "Take a shower, and get food. Just..."

"I know," Tom assured us. "Be careful. Because it's not like my life and freedom doesn't depend on it."

He said this with a sardonic smile, much like the one Marco would use.

Dad pulled him into a long hug. "I wish there was a better solution, Tom."

Tom just shrugged. "Hey, this is way better than being a slave in my own mind. Besides, it's kind of like I'm the male version of Anne Frank. In hiding until the Nazi Yeerks are defeated." Tom nudged me in the ribs. "That's your job, Midget."

"The Andalites', Tom," I corrected, rolling my eyes at him. "We're just there to annoy Visser Three until they get back and do the real damage."

"Well, they better get a move on," Dad sighed.

"We're not the only race they're fighting to save," Tom pointed out. "The ones with the most people, sure, but not the only ones."

Like I said. He knew a lot more about the Yeerks than any of us.

"Tom, I'll be down every night to hang out and keep you from going crazy," I promised. "And you know I'll tell you about every mission we're doing."

"You better, Midget," Tom laughed. "I want to hear tons of stories of you guys kicking Yeerk butt."

Mom pulled Tom into a hug. "Your dad and I will be over all the time, too."

"All the time," Dad promised, also hugging Tom.

"Not just us, either. I'll bring Rachel and Marco," I added. "Plus, Tobias and Cassie."

Tom grinned. "Thanks, Midget."

During the weeks, then months, that followed, Tom and I became close once more. As guilty as we all felt that he was stuck in the basement while the rest of us were living relatively normal lives, Tom was the first to point out that this was more freedom than he'd experienced in months. He was grateful to me, for having saved him. He was free, no longer a slave in his head.

Everything else? That would come once the Yeerks were defeated.

I hadn't expected him to come face to face with his old Yeerk again.

That happened when Temrash 114 infested me a few months later.


	2. Chapter 2.0

My name is Tom. I'm not going to tell you my last name because my kid brother, Jake, is fighting the Yeerks. Even though I am in hiding, if I gave you my last name, you'd be able to find him.

There's no way I'm going to let that happen.

You already know how Jake managed to save me from the Yeerk Pool. My slug was feeding when he and his friends burst in, all as wild animals, and managed to free me.

Others, too, at least until Visser Three showed up. If they weren't recaptured or killed afterwards. As far as I know, I was the only one who made it out of that hell hole, and am still free.

Since I need to remain in the basement almost all the time, I know that Jake and my parents think that my life is pretty awful right now. In the very beginning, I thought that they were nuts. After all, I could move by myself. Talk to my family, and give them hugs. We did that almost non-stop during the first week. It's slowed down a little since then, except with Jake. You better believe I'm going to hug him before he goes out on what he and his friends/fellow child soldiers call a "mission". It could be the last time I ever see him. Of course, as soon as he gets back, I give him another huge hug, because I've spent the entire day worrying that he's been killed and we'll never find out.

It's been a few months, now, that I'm no longer a slave to an evil alien slug. Enough time for my new situation to become...just a little confining. Especially since none of us know how much longer it's going to last. Sort of takes being grounded to a new level. When I start to get bored or want to mope around, I remind myself of everything I have that I didn't before. Two things, in particular. I can move my body. Also, I don't have an alien in my head, mocking me, and trying to figure out how to infest my family. So, if I ever get too down or want to throw a pity party because I can't go outside and shoot hoops, I just remind myself that I couldn't even blink on my own until a few months ago.

Besides, I've seen the Yeerk Pool at least a hundred times. I know that I'm one of the lucky ones. How many people there wouldn't cut off their hands, their arms, to trade places with me? What I've been through...they're still slaves to evil parasites. Indefinitely. Seriously, there have to be thousands of humans who are slaves inside their head, not to mention all of the Hork-Bajir and Gedds and Taxxons. Unlike me, they can't do anything on their own, because they have their own personal alien overlord, taking over their bodies whenever they're not swimming in the Yeerk Pool sludge. You wouldn't think that six inch grey slugs would have that kind of power, but speaking from personal experience, I can promise you that, yeah, they do.

When we agreed that the best way for me to stay safe was to relocate to the basement, I joked that I was like Anne Frank, hiding from the Nazis. Since then, I've read her diary a few times. Trust me, I have it way better than she does. For one thing, I have the basement to myself (except for when I have visitors, like Midget and my parents) and it's like five times bigger than the attic she shared with her family and neighbors. I can also go upstairs to shower and brush my teeth, as long as I'm careful. While I can't be 100% sure, I can be 99.9% sure that Mom's food is way better than anything Anne and her family ate. (Especially since I get dessert.) Plus, I have books to read and movies to watch, and the furniture is way more comfortable than anything they used back then.

Sure, I'm in hiding from the Yeerk equivalent of the Nazis, but I imagine that if she were around today, she'd trade places with me in a heartbeat. Probably, she'd say I was Anne Frank 2.0.

Or, whatever the male version of the name "Anne" would be.

Sometimes, when I really think about it, the worst part is feeling useless. Because, after all, I can't morph, which means that I can't help Jake out in his battles.

On the other hand, I can help him with his homework, and I know a lot more about the Yeerks than they learned from Elfangor or Ax.

Well, technically, Aximili, but everyone calls him Ax, so I do, too. It's definitely a lot easier to say.

"So, Midget," I'd asked, after he'd first introduced me to him, "does this mean that if Elfangor had lived and been on your side, you'd have nicknamed him 'Elf'?"

Jake had just shrugged. "Marco's call. 'Sides, Elfangor's kind of easier to say than Aximili."

Okay, point taken.

Anyway, Elfangor had been a great Andalite prince who had given them the power to morph. Ax was just the kid brother who was still learning not to play with words or eat cigarette butts.

Yes, seriously. He actually likes the taste of them.

His human morph is a compilation of the DNA of all of the Animorphs. As a result, Ax's human morph looked like a very pretty boy. Jake told me that every one of the Animorphs could see something in his features that looked like them, which made sense, because it was.

Because I'd been a Controller, I knew a lot more about the dark secrets of the Andalites than Jake and the others. Like, for example, Seerow's Kindness. Or Alloran's Quantum Virus. Temrash had been a total jerk, like all of his alien slugs, and part of that jerkiness involved giving me any and every piece of information I could ever want to know (or not know) about the other alien races. While a part of me might have been glad that he would be happy to answer any of my questions, most of me knew it wasn't out of any concern for me, but more as a way to show off his own knowledge.

I'd had more than a few teachers like that, come to think of it.

Out of respect for Ax, though, I keep a lot of what I know about Andalites to myself. After all, he's part of their team, and I'm, well, not. As long as they can work well together to defeat the Yeerks, it's not any of my business what Ax decides to keep from the others.

Well, as long as it doesn't hurt their fight.

I knew, from lots of long talks with Jake, that he and the others felt like they were being more of an annoyance to Visser Three than an actual threat. Kind of like a pack of bees or wasps that keep stinging you. Sure, it hurts like hell in the moment, but a few days later, there's only the memory of the sting, and the overall aversion to that whole group of insects as a whole.

Which, to be fair, was probably how Visser Three saw Andalites to begin with.

Today, things would be different. Jake had learned about a new clinic opening up, run by the Yeerks, and their plan to infest our governor who was scheduled for surgery. Which would be a pretty important mission by itself, but the governor was planning to run for president pretty soon. If the Yeerks managed to infest the would be president...

It wouldn't exactly be "game over", but it would be a huge trophy for them.

Not for the first time, I wish I could morph and be an asset to them. Not to mention, get out of the basement, but I'm not about to whine about that when they're risking their lives for the ten billionth time.

Also, only for only the ten billionth time, Jake reminds me that the best thing I can do for him is stay safe and not get infested by a Yeerk who knows everything about me, and therefore, everything about them.

What can I say? We all have our off to war rituals.

"Can I at least give you a huge hug for luck?" I ask him for...well, you get the idea.

As usual, Jake grins at me, but he also rolls his eyes. "Okay, fine."

A minute later, Jake (again) half-heartedly complains that I've (again) crushed all the ribs in his body, and I retort that he can just morph out of whatever injury I've caused him.

We're both joking, obviously. Jake's admitted to liking my "bear hugs", especially after he returns from a battle, or even when comes to the basement to talk to me after he's had an especially bad nightmare. However, he's still a thirteen year old kid and, therefore, far too mature for overt displays of affection.

Another change that's happened since my parents found out about the Yeerks is that we've adopted Tobias.

Jake was the one who came up with the idea, and he came to me first.

"Tom?" he'd asked me, and I looked up from my math book.

Yes, I was still keeping up with school. Well, to an extent. I couldn't take exams or anything, and I definitely couldn't get the textbooks for the next year. But, I could try to finish the work through the end of the year, and it was something to do when I wasn't watching TV, running on Dad's treadmill, or lifting weights. When the Yeerks lost, I figured I would take my GEDs and then go to college.

"Hey, Midget. What's up?" I'd asked him. Placing the book down, I'd patted the couch cushion next to me. "Come on, have a seat. I don't bite."

He'd laughed, and sat down. "You know, this isn't too bad for a bed."

My old bed would have been too awkward to move, especially without the help of movers, and my dad couldn't just buy a new one without drawing suspicion.

Or, maybe, we were all being too paranoid. At any rate, the massive couch had suited me just fine as a bed.

"I promise, Midget, it's very comfortable," I'd assured him, which was completely true. "Anyway, what's up?"

Jake had taken a deep breath. "It's about Tobias."

I'd also inhaled, sharply. "Is his crappy uncle hurting him?"

I'd known that he drank too much, and was an awful guardian to Tobias. That he also didn't have anyone else who really cared about him. At least, in the way of family.

As you might have been able to guess, if there was one thing I couldn't stand, it was family hurting each other. Siblings picking on siblings always made me mad, but adults bullying kids...

Let's just say that, before the Yeerks, I'd always thought that one of the worst places in hell was reserved for child abusers.

Jake had shrugged. "We morph so much, if there were any bruises, they wouldn't be there long enough to show CPS," he'd pointed out. "I think it's more that he's just being neglected. Not that it's a just, I mean..."

I'd placed a hand around Jake's shoulder. "No, I get it. That totally stinks, not to have family who care enough about you."

Jake had nodded, again. "I was thinking...but I wanted to ask you first. Make sure that you're really okay with it, and all."

"Spit it out, Jake," I'd urged. "What are you thinking?"

He'd mumbled something about beds and adoption.

"Huh?" I'd asked.

Another sigh. "I was thinking that we could get Mom and Dad to adopt him. Officially. I mean, his uncle doesn't care about him, and we have your room...not that it isn't your room anymore, Tom, but with the Yeerks, and with you having to live down here...and since they know, anyway-"

I'd put up a hand to stop him from rambling for the next year. Well, the next ten minutes.

"Midget. I think it's a great idea."

"Really?"

I'd rolled my eyes at him. "Like you said. I'm down here, for the foreseeable future, and one of your friends and fellow soldiers is, at best, being neglected by his guardian. Tobias deserves to be safe and to be loved. Anyway, it would be a lot safer for him to be here than anywhere else. Especially if his deadbeat uncle gets himself infested. Yes. I think it's a great idea, and we should jump on it." Then, I'd paused. "Did you talk to Tobias about this?"

Jake had shaken his head. "I wanted your okay, and Mom and Dad's, first."

"You have mine, and I don't think it will take much convincing for our parents. But, look, have them come downstairs, okay? Before you talk to them. I want to be a part of the conversation, and, well..." I'd trailed off.

"Okay. Yeah, definitely."

I'd given Jake another hug. "You're a great kid, Midget. Now, go on. Get them down here. Um, they're home, right?"

"Yeah, they're home."

Mom and Dad had been more than willing, and what with my recent "death", it had seemed like whatever questions the neighbors might have had (not that their opinions mattered) would have been mitigated by the loss in the family. Of course, with the grief that they was facing, it made perfect sense to take in the neglected friend of their only living son.

Sometimes, things in life don't work out the way they should. People who are perfectly healthy and young suddenly die. A great couple can't have kids for no medical reason. A routine surgery goes wrong and the patient ends up in a coma for the rest of their life.

Teenagers like me join a harmless group to get to know a pretty girl and end up as a slave to an alien parasite.

Then, there are times when it seems like there would be a ton of problems, like the adoption of a teenager who technically has a guardian, but obviously doesn't care about him, but might still want to hold onto custody just to be a jerk. Because of family politics and all of that.

As it happened, the whole thing went through in a couple of weeks. Tobias' uncle had been happy to toss his nephew to a couple who wanted to take him in. Or, maybe, he'd heard about my death and didn't want to cause a rift in the community. Whatever it had been, he'd given the okay.

Tobias had been thrilled, obviously, but Jake had told me that he'd been smart enough not to let it show in front of his uncle. His uncle had insisted on keeping Dude (Tobias' cat), but that seemed like a small enough price to pay. Like I said, within a couple of weeks, Tobias had moved his few belongings into my room.

"I won't change anything around," he'd promised me, once he'd arrived with his small bag of clothes. "I know it's still your room."

I'd given him a hug in response. "You're family now, Tobias. Don't worry about stuff like that."

Anyway, it hadn't been like I'd be using the room much until the Yeerks were gone. Plus, the basement was a lot larger, and anything I really needed was down there. Tobias should have a place of his own, without worrying about the "ghost" of me.

Not that I'd ended up seeing a ton of him on his own, at first. Jake and Tobias still go to school, after all. Still have their battles to fight and homework to do. Even with Tobias having officially been made a part of our family, it must have felt a little awkward for him.

As far as I could tell, everyone had been trying to make this an easy transition for everyone, especially Tobias. Poor kid had never known family who wanted him, and he'd probably still worried that we'd toss him out on the street for no reason.

Now, a couple of months after he'd moved in, he and Jake were going over plans for the clinic battle.

"Destroy it," I voice my suggestion to the entire group. "Seriously, just take some sticks of dynamite, and burn it to the ground."

Mom and Dad raise their eyebrows at me.

"Tom, this is a hospital clinic we're talking about," he objects. "Even if there are alien slugs involved."

In other words, show some respect to the medical field.

"Okay, fine," I amend, making an overly fake pouty face. "No dynamite."

"Oh, I'm sure there will be plenty of destruction," Marco promises me, giving me a wink that I return.

"If necessary." Jake rolls his eyes at us. "For now, we're just observing. Scouting. Not every mission is about demolition, Tom."

I cross my arms against my chest. "You're no fun, Midget."

There's more banter, and even more planning, and finally, everyone except Mom and Dad and I leave the basement.

Since we've already given Jake hugs before his friends arrived-Tobias isn't big on those-we just wish him good luck before the mission.

We know better to embarrass Jake in front of his friends, after all.

A couple of hours later, I hear yelling from upstairs.

I want to race upstairs to find out what's going on.

I only barely manage not to.

More yelling, and stomping, and I swear that I can hear tears.

The suspense might kill me, but then, the door opens, and Dad's dragging Jake's body downstairs.

Midget.

"He's not dead," Dad reassures me, before I can speak. "Just unconscious."

Marco's running down the stairs next, followed by everyone else.

"What happened?" I demand. "Is he going to be okay?"

(Prince Jake has been infested,) Ax explains.

I just watch as they go about the process of grabbing a chair, then some rope. Tying a still unconscious Jake up, while Ax's tail blade remains inches from his neck.

As they work, Tobias and Marco take turns giving me the story.

The mission was a success. They found a Yeerk pool at the clinic, and parboiled the Yeerks. Except, some Controllers with Dracon beans saw what was going on, and began shooting.

During this commotion, Jake was aimed at a few times, and fell in the pool. It was long enough for him to be infested. Also, he didn't respond to them for several minutes. It was Ax who figured it out, first, and as soon as the slug controlling my brother saw Ax, he made this face of disgust that confirmed it. Add in a few more arrogant Yeerk missteps, and they knew that Jake was a Controller.

They didn't believe it, at first. Jake looked, acted, normal enough. But, they always do. I know. I was one. A slave to Temrash 252 for months. Could have easily turned into years, had Jake and the others not rescued me.

Mom and Dad must be hearing the story for the first time. Or, the version I've just heard.

"What do we do, now?" Dad asks, and Mom's hands are over her mouth, like she's trying not to scream or cry.

I head over to her, put a hand on her arm in some small display of comfort. Mom manages a weak smile at me.

(The Yeerk must leave Prince Jake's head within three days to soak up Kandrona rays in the Yeerk Pool,) Ax reminds us. (We must guard him for that time.)

Jake groans, now, returning to consciousness.

"What the hell, guys? I keep telling you," Jake complains. "There's no Yeerk in my head."

"You called Ax 'Andalite filth'," Tobias reminds him. "You weren't responding for several minutes, and your head was in the pool long enough for a Yeerk to get in."

"Like I told you before, I was stressed out, and all of the Yeerks were dead by the time the Controllers started shooting at us," Jake protests, struggling against the ropes. "I'm not a Controller."

"Even if he's not infested, there's no way we can let him out of our sight for three days," I determine. "I'm not the leader, but I'm Jake's brother, and it's because of him I'm free. Anyway, it's Saturday. The Yeerk will be dead by Tuesday morning. Mom? Dad? Jake can miss two days of school, right?"

"Two?" Dad asks, perplexed.

I heave a sigh. "Even if that slug is dead before school starts on Tuesday, Midget is going to be in no shape to get through classes. Trust me, I know what I'm talking about."

Dad nods. "All right, Tom. I will call the school on Monday and tell them that Jake is sick."

(I could play Prince Jake at the human school,) Ax offers.

"NO!" Everyone shouts.

"Sorry, Ax-man, but it's way too risky," Tobias explains, diplomatically. "You play with your words too much, and you still eat everything in sight. Way easier for everyone if Jake misses a couple of days of school."

Our parents, who don't take missing school lightly, don't protest at this assessment.

"Is Jake going to be okay?" Mom asks me. "Once this-this thing is out of him?"

I force a smile. "I was, right? It's going to be horrible for the Midget, but he'll pull through."

Jake-the Yeerk-glares at me.

"The main thing is to keep him from getting back to the Yeerk Pool," Cassie explains. "If that happens..."

"We're done for," I determine. Glancing around at everyone, I add, "He's going to need people guarding him at all times. Prevent him from pulling anything funny."

Ax speaks up. (Since I do not attend human school, I can be there to act as a guard, along with Tom,) he suggests.

"Good. Tobias, stay over there. Make sure he doesn't..."

Ax understands, and hovers over Jake. His tail blade inches from his throat.

I pull the others aside, and speak quietly. "Okay, I know I'm not the leader or an Animorph, but here's what I'm thinking." I pause, and the others give me what I take to be the nonverbal go ahead. "Tobias, you'll need to stay here at all times. At least, until Monday. Except for sleeping, of course." I glance at my parents. "Mom, Dad? It's not enough to keep Jake from returning to the pool. We need to keep Jake tied up, and locked down here until that slug dies. Ax, too, which we've already established. I figure...we should have at least two Animorphs awake and alert at all times. Tobias and Ax can take the first shift, then, Marco? Can you?"

"You bet," Marco agrees. "I can sneak out...naw, I'll just tell my dad I'm spending the night, here. And tomorrow. I'll say it's some big assignment for class."

I nod. "Rachel and Cassie can come by tomorrow. Rachel, you'll go first, in the morning, okay? Cassie, you get the afternoon."

We run down a list of who gets which shift, and Tobias grabs a pen and paper and writes everything down.

After everyone has their schedule memorized, and everyone not on duty heads out, Mom and Dad pull me aside.

"Tom, honey? What's Jake going through, now? Can he hear any of this?" Mom asks.

I sigh. "I want to lie to you, but the truth is, Jake can hear and see everything. He's a complete slave in his mind. That slug, the one who's talking through his mouth, moving his body for him, it controls everything, but Jake is completely aware. He is powerless, but he can feel everything. He's probably panicked, too. He can hear us, though. He-" I stop talking, and, suddenly, Mom and Dad are hugging me like they're never going to let go.

Their hug feels so good, and it reminds me that, once this is over, I'm going to be giving Jake more bear hugs than ever. I'll make him sleep next to me for at least two weeks, too. I know that he's going to have nightmares and will need someone who's been through this.

Then, we turn to Jake, who's still sitting bolt upright, neck less than an inch away from Tobias' massive tail blade.

"You could just leave his head now," Tobias suggests, casually. "Die quickly, probably painlessly. I hear that Kandrona starvation is a pretty painful way to go."

"Not a chance," Jake's Yeerk spits out. "I will take him to Visser Three and receive a well deserved promotion."

"At least, you've stopped pretending," Tobias observes, rolling his eyes.

The first shift is me (as moral support, and because I can't leave the basement anyway), Tobias, and Ax. Jake's Yeerk doesn't try morphing right away, but I'm sure it's only a matter of time. He just sits on the chair, glowering at us.

When Tobias leaves to go to the bathroom, and it's just me and Ax, I feel vulnerable. Even more so when Jake's Yeerk speaks up. "I was surprised to see you again, Tom."

My stomach does a flip, but I force my expression into a glare. "Again, Yeerk?"

Jake's mouth forms a smile. "Not Yeerk. Temrash 114. Although, perhaps, you remember me as Temrash 252." He grins, widely. "I was sure that my former host body had escaped, even after my brother Yeerks told me about your funeral. I was right. I do believe that I will keep your brother as my new host body, as he is a far superior host body than you are. Still, Tom, I will recommend to the visser the perfect Yeerk for you. In the meantime," he muses, "I have been telling your little brother all about our time together. What to look forward to during the many, many years he will have with me."

"You're lying," I growl.

He must be. Jake knows the name of my old Yeerk, so whoever this new one is, he's just using what information I gave Jake to make me think that he was my old one. It's impossible. Temrash 252 might have been assigned a new host after I disappeared, but the chances of him being in the hospital pool are tiny. The chances of him entering Jake's head, out of all of the Yeerks who could have, are even smaller than that.

No. It's not Temrash. Just a Yeerk pretending to be him, to make me angry at Jake. To force me to make a mistake.

To hurt him.

"Am I?" The Yeerk's smile grows even wider. "I already showed Jake several memories from your past. How you wet the bed until you were six years old. He also now knows that you, the perfect child, cheated on that spelling test when you were ten. That oh so creative fantasy you had involving Amanda...You remember her, of course. You joined The Sharing for..."

"SHUT! UP!" I scream, lunging at Jake.

The Yeerk chuckles to himself. "I told Jake what I did to you after you fought me. At the Sharing barbecue, remember? Oh yes, you managed to seize a small amount of control for a half a second, but after ten hours of mental torture, didn't you promise never to fight me again? Weren't you a pathetic, whimpering creature? You begged me, Tom-"

"SHUT UP!" I yell again.

But, it's hopeless. It's like I'm back in my head, imprisoned. More than that, the fact that Jake, that my kid brother, is experiencing the same thing...

I want to reach into Jake's ear, grab the slug, and stomp on him again and again.

Unfortunately, only Visser Three has a varynx. Only he can force a Yeerk out of their host like that. All I can do-all Jake can do-is wait it out.

I force myself to breathe deeply, to remember that Jake is still there, and needs to see me calm. Cheering him on. Encouraging him to keep it together.

It's common knowledge around the Yeerk Pool that it takes the average involuntary host six months to break completely. When Jake saved me, I was just starting my fifth month. Once you break, well, sure, you can come back, but it's hard. Because, for whatever reason, the motivation to fight has disappeared from your brain. That's true even when the Yeerk isn't there. I've seen humans in the cages, not moving, just blinking and breathing. The only functions that seem to work are the ones they can't consciously control. Because, it's like a switch has flipped. Why bother? And then, even if they're freed, they've already lost.

I know Temrash. How hard he tried to break me. Jake's as strong as I am, and he might only have him for three days, but I know what kind of damage he can do during that time.

Especially when Jake sees what Temrash had done to me.

I kneel before Jake, placing my hands on his shoulders and staring straight into his eyes. "Jake, honey. Midget. I know you're there. I know you can hear me. Listen to me. Keep fighting. Don't give up, okay? In less than three days, this slug will be dust. You'll be free, okay? Hang in there."

If Jake tries to fight me, nothing shows on his face. I stand up, but hold his hand in a death grip.

I keep talking to him. I keep telling Jake how strong he is, how brave he is, and how this will be over soon.

Then, Temrash begins to morph.

Thank God, Ax is there within a second, tail at Jake's throat. Tobias, too, is almost midway to red tailed hawk.

Temrash realizes it's a losing battle, and reverses the morph.

I tighten the ropes around Jake's hands and legs again. I know it hurts, but I also know that Temrash feels the pain way more than Jake does. Oh, he might lessen his hold on Jake to make him feel his senses more acutely, but if he does so, Jake can fight back more easily.

Hours pass. Mom and Dad stay upstairs, and I can't blame them. I wish I had that option. Kind of. I know I wouldn't take it, or at least, that's what I tell myself. Temrash continues to spew hatred at me, claiming that he knows what Jake thinks of each of them, but I also know that Jake's still there and this is probably the worst kind of pain he's ever been in. I'm not leaving his side, no matter what Temrash says or tries to do.

At the same time...

After Marco arrives, I pull Tobias aside for a moment. I speak in a whisper.

"Look, I'm not blaming you or anyone, but I have to ask," I begin.

Tobias tenses, and I place a hand on his shoulder, reassuringly. Thing is, Tobias isn't much for touch (I don't want to think about why that is, because I'm sure I know the answer), and he barely manages to hide a flinch. I probably make a face of my own, and let my hand drop.

"Yeah?" he asks, as casually as he can, given the circumstances.

"Why bring him back here? I'm not saying you should have killed Jake or anything, but..." I trail off.

Tobias nods. "I suggested a shack that wasn't far from your house, but Cassie thought that you and your parents would freak out, finding he was infested and having to wait almost three days to see him. Not that this is much better." Tobias winces. "We also didn't know that it was your Yeerk."

I laugh humorlessly. "The odds against it were pretty astronomical, but it would happen to us. Anyway," I add, "once Jake's free, he's gonna want to see his family right away. After what he will have been through, it would be cruel to make him morph and travel from a shack to our house. On an empty stomach, too."

Tobias considers this. "Yeah, you're probably right. Tom, do you think we should be feeding him?"

I shake my head. "Depriving him of water for three days would probably kill him, or almost. But food? Jake's going to be hungry as hell when he's free, sure, but we'll give him whatever he wants to eat, then. In the meantime, we need to weaken Temrash as much as possible. It won't starve his slug body any quicker, but a weakened Jake sure won't be fun for him. Anyway, while I don't know a ton about the science of Kandrona starvation, I wouldn't be surprised if the added stress makes him die faster." I shrug. "Wishful thinking, probably, but it's going to hurt the slug and it won't do Jake any long term damage."

"Will Jake feel hunger? When the slug's still in his head?" Tobias asks, and there's a note of concern in his voice.

Like his almost aversion to touching, I can't think too much about it. Not now, anyway.

"Jake's aware of all of his senses, but in a very muted way. Temrash has full control of his body through Jake's mind, which means he's overtaken Jake on pretty much everything." I frown, not sure if I'm explaining it well. Not sure if I know how to explain it. "Basically, yeah, Jake will be aware of being hungry, but not like he would be if he was free. Not even close. We're making Temrash suffer way more than Jake."

"I figure," Tobias adds, "Jake would want us to do this."

"Probably. Jake's a tough kid, and he knows we're at war." I sigh. "Are you okay, Tobias?"

He seems surprised by the question. "Tom, I'm not the one..."

Tobias trails off, but I know him well enough to understand what he's not saying.

I manage a smile. "Point taken. Yeah, it's not exactly been fun, but it's just a little over two days to go. For all of us."

Time passes. As we agreed, we don't give Jake anything to eat, because we want Temrash to be as weak as possible. Temrash is downright furious about this and claims we're hypocrites and violating a million war crimes. That might be true, but I still only barely resist the urge to kick him.

Anyway, like I told Tobias, water is a must, so we give him enough to drink.

We continue to rotate guards-minus Ax, who's been great-and just count down the days, and then the hours, until it's all over.

If Ax wasn't there, things would have been a lot more complicated. Not that it would have been impossible, but Ax is practically a built in weapon. He doesn't need to change out of his Andalite body, after all, and his tail blade is a powerful weapon. Moreover, he can go without sleep for days, and he knows that we're depending on him in this way, especially. It would be too much pressure for a regular kid, but Ax's biology and training-albeit still limited-is a major asset for us. It almost makes me think that a second or third guard is helpful, but probably unnecessary. Whenever Temrash tries to morph, Ax catches him with a tail blade at his throat, and he reverses the cycle.

Well, better safe than sorry, and don't have all your eggs in one basket, and all that.

Our schedules coordinate so that, at the end of the second day, Jake sleeps when I do. I haven't been able to get much rest since this started. Yeah, poor me. On the other hand, my dreams are nightmares, and Temrash is back in my head, torturing me, so it's more than just not waking up feeling rested.

This time, when I wake up, Jake-Temrash-smirks at me. "Dreaming of me, Tom?" he asks.

"Shut up," I snarl.

"When I go through the fugue, if I go through the fugue, this host will see everything. It will be...almost amusing," Temrash confides in me. "I have told him much, but like you, he does not listen. He fights back. He will see everything when I die, though."

I don't doubt this. "Leave him now, then. Why put yourself through the fugue?"

"Because, human, your brother will suffer as well as I will. Besides, I know that just imagining what I am doing to him now fills you with pain. What both of you will go through when I die and pass on my memories to him, and yours to him..." Temrash paused for effect. "That makes it worth it." Temrash then smiles. "I will almost enjoy it."

"Oh yeah?" I growl, standing up, towering over him. "Well, in two days, you'll be dead, and we'll be alive and free. We will destroy the empire, and watch as millions of your kind die in agony."

Temrash snorts. "Six of you, against millions of us? You really are a foolish little boy, Tom."

It's all I can do not to slap him. I know that Jake would forgive me, and he probably wouldn't even feel it, much. But...I can't.

I'd just be doing what the slug wanted from me.

No. Better to wait it out, and try not to think too much about what my kid brother is going through. He has to know that it's only a matter of time.

He has to.

The final hours pass. Temrash makes even more attempts at escape, but even without sleeping for more than two days in a row, Ax is quick, reliable. So are the others.

I wish I could say that I could see that the lack of food is getting to Temrash, but maybe, he's gone into some survival mode. Or, maybe, he's just fighting through it. If he's weakening, he's sure not letting us see it.

Still. I tell myself that Temrash is suffering, at least in his one body, and it's only a matter of hours.

I'm glad.

Several times, Mom and Dad want to check on Jake, but I stop them. I'm scared that they would cave, seeing him in pain. Temrash, I know, would milk them for all it's worth. It's just way too risky.

With only hours left, we can't be reckless.

Once again, I reflect on the irony. It's funny, really. Jake's the leader, but, right now, I feel like I have that role. I haven't exactly been yelling out orders, but I'm making a lot of the decisions. The others listen to me, even if I'm not an Animorph, even if I can't do anything useful except stay alive and uninfested.

Anyway, Temrash doesn't quit goading me, even in these last hours. I try to tune him out as he tells me all of the ways he's making my kid brother suffer. If even half of the things he says are true, then the fugue is way too good for him.

They've told me that Jake was infested around 10 in the morning on Saturday. Which means that we have until about that time on Tuesday. Tobias and Ax are there on Monday evening. I don't want to sleep, but they insist.

"He'll need you to be there, to be ready, when the Yeerk leaves," Tobias tells me.

So, around midnight, I let myself drift off. I wake up at around 6 in the morning. Jake's awake, and his face has contorted with pain. The Yeerk's pain.

He cries out for the last couple of hours. Not constantly, but periodically. Tobias and I each take one of his hands and hold on, tightly. As much to comfort him as to keep him from trying to morph, to escape.

Even though Temrash probably knows that he would never make it back to the Yeerk Pool in time, even if no one was there. Jake's body is too weak from hunger, as well his slug body.

Finally, Jake blinks. Turns and looks at us. I know it's him. Once more, I squeeze his hand.

"Almost there, Midget," I promise him.

He nods.

I know, somehow, that it's Jake doing the nodding, and not Temrash.

Before I can fully process what that means, the slug emerges from his ear.

It falls on the floor, and turns to dust.

Immediately, I untie him. "Tobias!" I shout, as I'm loosening the ropes, "get our parents!"

He runs off without responding.

Jake's eyes are filling with tears, and his whole body is shaking. I'm speaking quietly as I untie him, soothingly, even though I have no idea what I'm saying. Once the ropes are finally off, I lift Jake from the chair, and carry him in my arms onto the couch that's become my bed for the last few months.

"Midget, it's okay, now," I murmur, gently. "You're free."

"Free," he repeats, like he can't believe it. "Free."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My original plan was for each chapter to correspond to a book. Not that I was going to write 54+ chapters, but each book would be limited to one chapter. When "The Capture" was approaching the length of some fanfics I'd written before, I realized that I would either need to do massive cutting, or change up the plan. While I've removed large amounts from fanfics before (most notably, one hundred pages from a future part of a project that-for personal reasons-remains on probably permanent hiatus, so you'll just have to believe that it exists on a Google doc), "The Capture" was kind of a game changer in the Animorphs series, and it's no less pivotal in my series. In particular, the personal development and ANGST that Tom and Jake go through together. So, cutting angsty or healing scenes in this chapter simply for the sake of shortening it to fit into my initial plan...wasn't going to happen. The compromise is two chapters, although I suppose you could call this chapter 2.0, and the other one chapter 2.5. Ah, loopholes.


	3. Chapter 2.5

Jake's free. The Yeerk is dead.

Then, suddenly, I hug him tightly, maybe too tightly. If so, Jake doesn't protest. His grip on me feels as strong as mine on him.

No way either of us are letting go anytime soon.

After a minute or so, I speak up.

"Jake? Mom and Dad are gonna be down any minute," I promise him, still keeping my voice low and gentle. "Then, we're going to get you whatever you want to eat, and after that, Midget, you can rest the whole day. You don't have to go to school."

"Tom! Don't leave me!" he nearly shouts.

I hug him even tighter. "I won't," I promise, working hard to keep my voice gentle. "I'm staying right here. I promise. I'm not going to leave your side, okay?"

This seems to help, but Jake's still shaking and holding onto me for dear life. A thought occurs to me, and I turn my head towards Ax. "Hey, Ax? Hand me those blankets."

Ax retrieves the pile of blankets that I've used for the last few months. Reluctantly releasing one arm from around Jake's body, guide Jake to the couch, then have him sit down. I plant myself next to him, and tuck the blankets in around Jake as best as I can.

"T-thanks," he mumbles, leaning against me.

I put an arm around Jake. "No problem, Midget."

Our parents return, then. Mom carries a tray with all of Jake's favorite foods. Mostly breakfast ones. Dad's looking worried, to put it mildly.

"Mom. Dad," Jake manages to get out.

Mom puts the tray down on the table right in front of the couch. Directly in front of Jake and me. She leans over and, crying, sort of half picks Jake up, holding him in a long hug. Jake holds on to her, and one of the blankets drops to the couch. As soon as she lets go, Dad also pulls my kid brother into a bear hug. Then, he sets him down, next to me. I rearrange the blankets around Jake, who's started to cry for the first time since that slug left his head, but the tears are silent ones. He wipes them away, quickly, like he's ashamed of it.

Once again, I hold him, with both arms around him in a sort of backwards hug. Jake curls himself against me, again, burrowing his head into my shirt.

I'd been Temrash's slave for over four months before they got me out. Even though Jake only had to deal with him for three days, I'm sure that he got the worst of that Yeerk during that time. Temrash was never even half decent towards me, but still. He was an empire Yeerk, and he had duties to perform. He couldn't spend all of his time and energy torturing me.

I'm pretty sure the same can't be said about Jake. Especially when Temrash knew that there was no getting out alive. Knowing him, he used Jake like a punching bag for those three days.

Mom and Dad don't know all of this. I've kept a lot about my time as a Controller...not secret, but quiet. At least, from them. They know the basics, of course, but not the details. Partly, it's because I don't want to relive it.

Mostly, it's to protect them.

They stay with Jake for awhile, taking turns sitting next to him, because there's no way I'm giving up my seat. They try to reassure him, but really, what can they say? What can any of us say? So, after a minute of Jake not really responding, they just take his hand and sit with him.

I'm relieved when Jake starts to show interest in the food, eating a decent amount of it right off the bat. He's hungry after not eating for three days, which has to be a good thing.

Around noon, Jake tells us he wants to sleep. Mom reaches out to help him up, probably take him to his bedroom, but he shakes his head.

"I want...I need to stay with Tom," he explains, his voice small, but determined.

I nod, giving them a meaningful look that Jake doesn't see. "I'm right here, Jake."

They agree and head upstairs. I go about the task of re-tucking Jake back under the blankets on the couch so he's as comfortable as possible. It's unnecessary, since his hands work fine, but it feels right to do this. Granted, at any other time, he would grumble half-heartedly, maybe roll his eyes. Today, Jake just looks relieved, maybe grateful, that I am here and taking care of him. Or, maybe, he's too exhausted and emotionally messed up to put in the effort to care. At any rate...

I stay next to him, laying on my side, one arm wrapped around him, the other one running my hand along his hair. His eyes close, and he lets out a small sigh.

"Tom. Don't leave me, okay?" he whispers.

"I'm not going anywhere, Midget," I promise him. Then, teasingly, I add, "That slug kept me up most of the last three days. I'm exhausted, too."

Jake manages a smile. "Yeah. Thanks, Tom."

"Hey, kiddo. That's what big brothers are for," I assure him. "Now, let's try to get some rest."

He nods, and I wrap him up into another hug. We both sleep for a few hours. It's not like either of us has had much in the way of sound sleep during the last three days, I imagine. I wake up before Jake, but he looks peaceful enough.

A half hour later, Jake wakes up, hungry again. There's still food left, so I carefully place the tray on his lap, he eats more of the dry cereal and a granola bar.

"Do you want to talk about anything?" I ask, gently, once he's done and the tray is back on the table.

"Not yet," Jake mumbles, not looking at me.

I nod, realizing belatedly that he can't see it. "Okay," I reassure him, keeping my voice calm, even. "Whenever you're ready. Or, if you're ready. I mean, you don't have to, ever, if you don't want to," I try to clarify. "Just know, Midget, I'm here for you."

He tries to smile. Fails. "Maybe we can watch TV?"

"Absolutely." I hand Jake the remote. "You pick the show."

He nods, manages a very small smile. "Not that there's much on right now that's good."

I tousle his hair. "Yeah, well. Bet we can find something if we search long enough."

He nods, turns on the TV. Once we settle on a game show, Jake leans back against me. "Thanks for being there, Tom. Even when he was being a jerk. I-I couldn't believe what he said to you."

I wrap my arms around him for, oh, only the thousandth time that day. "At the risk of sounding corny and cliche, that's why I had to be there."

"He really wanted you to hurt me," Jake continues, after a pause, shuddering slightly.

"Yeah. Well, I more than kind of wanted to punch him in the face," I admit. "Unfortunately, I couldn't do that without hurting you. Which sure wasn't going to happen."

"I would have understood," Jake tells me. "I wanted to punch him too."

I have to grin at this. Jake's not the type to get into fights, usually. "You'd have been crazy not to."

A small laugh. "Yeah. Probably." Jake pauses, then adds, "He figured that you wouldn't actually hurt me pretty soon. Still. It was a game to him."

I sigh, wondering just how much Jake's been hurt. Also, not wanting to know the answer.

"Yeah," I agree. "Hurting me, hurting you. It was always a game to him."

He stares at me. "I only had him for three days. You had him for..."

"Four months," I admit. "It was rough."

To put it mildly.

"How'd you-not break?" Jake asks, voice cracking.

I sigh, again. "I would have, probably. If you hadn't been able to save me. With jerks like him...we don't last longer than six months."

I don't add that, regardless of the level of jerkiness (and I'm pretty sure that Temrash is at least an 8 on the proverbial 1-10 scale), six months is still a pretty optimistic standard.

He doesn't need that kind of guilt.

"I'm really sorry, Tom," he whispers.

Carefully, I place my arms on his shoulders. "Hey. As soon as you knew, you saved me. You couldn't have known before then. Aliens invading the planet? Slugs taking over your brain? And, your brother is one of them? You're there, and you free me as soon as you can. Okay? As far as I'm concerned, you're a hero."

A small smile forms on Jake's face. "You mean it?"

"You better believe I mean it, Midget," I practically growl. As his face starts to crumple up, I soften my voice. "Yeah, I mean it, Jake."

He nods, slowly. "A-are you okay, Tom?"

Loaded question.

"I'm...getting there," I admit, which is the truth. "I still get nightmares, but I'm free. I can move on my own. I can think what I want without him punishing me. And, most importantly, I know that Mom and Dad are safe, and you're working your butt off to keep everyone that way." I wrap my arms around him. "I'm incredibly proud of you, Jake. Like, probably, the proudest brother in the world."

Jake settles himself against me again. "Thanks, Tom."

We're quiet for awhile. I speak up at the next commercial. "Midget, you're probably going to have nightmares for awhile. More than usual. I'm here. I'm always here, Jake. To talk, to give you a huge hug..." I punctuate this with another massive hug, which gets a real laugh from my kid brother. "Whatever you need, I'm here for you, Midget."

"Thank you," Jake echoes. "I...that helps."

"Good. I'm glad."

We smile at each other, and then just continue to watch mindless TV for the next hour or so.

When it's time for dinner with my family, Jake reluctantly heads upstairs, promising to be back soon. Of course, I give him another hug before he leaves. When I see Jake again, accompanied by Mom carrying my dinner, and Homer at his side, he looks a little better, maybe, but still far from himself.

Which is completely understandable. Poor kid's been through hell. He's not going to be himself again for awhile.

"You're back. Great, you can keep me from dying from boredom," I grin, as though I'm asking out of loneliness from spending yet another day alone in the basement, instead of concern for my brother's mental state.

Jake nods, wordlessly, and takes a seat next to me. I wrap a few blankets around him, casually enough, as though I'm mostly concerned about whatever chill exists in the air.

Mom sits next to Jake, with both of her arms around him, protectively, as I eat my meal. Homer plops himself at Jake's feet, giving him the standard sad dog face as he waits for any food that Jake might drop on the floor.

Not today, Homer, I think.

Well, maybe once Mom's gone.

I'm both relieved and a little scared to see that Jake accepts Mom's comfort without any protest. Not even a half grumbled "Mom, I'm thirteen!"

At the same time, he's only been free for what, six hours? He's going to feel traumatized, violated, for at least a few days. I know I did.

We watch TV for a little while, with me and Mom staying right by Jake's side the whole time. Homer tries to take a seat in Jake's lap, but no luck, there. He's way too big, and Mom and I aren't going to give up our spots next to Jake. Not yet, anyway.

If Mom wasn't holding onto Jake for dear life, I'd be doing the same.

Not that I'm jealous.

Mom finally gives Jake a hug and a kiss on the top of his head, then gives me a hug and a whispers, "Thanks, Tom. You've been amazing." I smile and shrug a little in response. She heads upstairs with our plates to do the dishes, and, a few minutes later, Dad and Tobias arrive. At Jake's nod, Dad shoos Homer out of the way, taking Mom's former spot. Sorry, Homer. Tobias sits next to me, looking somewhat out of place, and when I raise my hand a little, questioningly, he gives me a nod. So, I put an arm around Tobias, and, just like Jake, he kind of settles himself in next to me.

I know that it's still weird for Tobias. Has to be for any foster kid, or adopted kid, in the beginning. Especially when you're a teenager when it goes through. Tobias has never had a real family, not for as long as he remembers, and not that I'm biased or anything, but I know that Jake and I have the world's best parents. At the same time, there has to be this sense of always being a visitor. Of not fitting in. Or being all too aware of your precarious position, even if the paperwork says that you're one of us. Emotionally, you're still an outsider, because you're not blood. Make one wrong move, and you're out. Or, if there are tough times, like a parent loses their job, maybe you're the one who will be the straw to break the camel's back.

It's not that he talks about this, or that I know any of this from experience. At the same time, now, I'm kind of an outsider in my family. After all, I'm technically dead. At least, according to the state.

I remind myself to keep an eye out for Tobias.

I give his shoulder another quick squeeze, and he gives me a grateful smile.

After only about ten more hugs for Jake from Mom and Dad, and only slightly less for me and Tobias, the three of them head upstairs. Immediately, Homer settles himself against Jake, whining at being left out. Jake strokes him for several minutes and, when he can't hide his yawns from me, asks me if he can spend the night. Hardly the first time, and the couch is more than big enough for both of us, so I agree.

"You bet. But, get changed into your pajamas, first," I tell him, tousling his hair.

He's showered before dinner, but put on regular clothes afterwards. I'm kind of glad. If anyone deserves a pajama day, it's Jake, but he's made the effort to get dressed, even if it's just for a day of recovery and TV watching.

Jake manages a nod, face trying to form a smile, but not quite making it. I stand up, give him another long hug.

"Hey, Midget. I promise, it's gonna get easier," I promise, in a low voice. "One day at a time."

Another nod, and his arms close around me, tightly. He leaves, trailed by Homer.

I hurry upstairs to brush my teeth and get changed just after Jake does. It's now dark enough that, as long as we're quick and no one sees us together, any neighbor who happens to be looking in and gets a glimpse of me could think it's Jake. It's kind of a shame that Tobias has blond hair, not brown. Or, that he's shorter than I am.

Then again, Jake and I look fairly similar. Not identical, and my hair's shorter than his. Although, now that I'm in hiding, I've decided to grow it out to his length. After all, if someone sees us from afar, the most noticeable difference between us is our hair length, since mine's really short and Jake's is longer. Not long like Marco's, but a good few inches longer. So, yeah. If our hair ends up being the same length, and no one gets a good look, it's safer. From a distance, in the right lighting, I could pass for Jake.

Not that we've talked about this. Anyway, hair only grows half an inch in a good month, and I've been free for just a few. My hair's still a couple of inches shorter than Jake's. Darker, too, but I'm not going to dye it.

There needs to be a line drawn somewhere.

Anyway, I get downstairs before Jake, and I make up the couch into a bed. It doesn't fold out or anything, so this just means placing sheets on top of the cushions for cleanliness, and then extra sheets beneath my blankets. Being a guy, I emit a ton of body heat, and while I don't sweat a ton while I sleep...let's just say that I don't want to sleep on top of my own odor for a year or more straight, without the possibility of being able to change out the cushions. I'm not OCD or anything, but anyone can see that would just be gross.

It's only just after 8:00 when Jake and Homer come downstairs. He's walking slower than usual, but maybe, it's just my imagination.

Even though I could go to bed whenever I want and sleep however late I want, I've been trying to keep a schedule as close to normal as possible. Maybe, it's about control. Or, just, keeping my body regulated. I've wondered how many people in my condition would just do whatever they want because they can, like eat ice cream and potato chips for every meal, and sleep all day. My parents-well, my dad-would probably have let me get away with that, at least for a week or so. But, it hasn't appealed to me. I'm not a health nut by a long shot, but you don't get to be the star of the basketball team by being a lazy bum.

Basketball. I've missed that. Even free, I can't do that anymore, for obvious reasons. Someday, though.

I greet Jake at the bottom of the stairs with yet another hug, and even though I half expect him to roll his eyes or shrug it off, he just squeezes back, like he's done every time so far today. He must need the reassurance, the physical comfort, as much as I do.

"I know it's still super early," I begin, "but do you want to try to get some sleep? Or just relax?"

He considers for a minute, then shrugs.

"Okay, well, how about if you rest on the bed and we watch some TV?" I offer. To lighten the mood, I add, "Maybe, after this, we can convince Mom and Dad to let you have a TV in your room."

Jake manages a shaky laugh, and we head over to my couch bed. He sits down, and I wrap the blankets around him. Well, not completely, since he's sitting up. I wrap an arm around him, and he relaxes himself against me.

I give him a gentle smiles, then turn on the TV. "How about I make the volume on the low side, so you can fall asleep when you want to?" I suggest.

"Yeah, okay," Jake agrees. Then, looking at Homer, he adds, "Do you mind if he stays with us?"

I shake my head. "It's not like he snores louder than you do," I tease.

Jake cracks a grin. "I'm not that bad."

"Uh huh. I'll let you know, tomorrow. Too bad the tape recorder is upstairs. I'd record you, and then use it as evidence," I joke, tousling his hair.

Another grin. "No way. I'd hide it, first."

"I know." I smile at Jake. "You're a smart kid."

I lower the volume of some sitcom (an episode of Friends, I think). Then, I wrap my other arm around Jake, who huddles against me. Except, after a minute or so, Jake begins shaking again. I move myself so I'm facing him. Homer whines at Jake's distress, but I need to focus my attention on my brother, not his dog.

"Hey. You okay?" I murmur, giving his shoulder a squeeze.

Jake clenches his jaw, takes a couple of deep breaths. "He. He mocked me. You, too. Called me Midget. Not just in the beginning, b-but when he told me..."

I sigh, and wrap my arms around him, again, thinking that's just so typical of Temrash. "Want me to stop calling you that? At least, for a little while?"

It would hurt, and it would be a hard habit to break, but I'd do it, for Jake.

But Jake shakes his head, almost violently. "No, because then, he's won."

I nod to myself, understanding what Jake means. I give his shoulder a gentle squeeze. "Okay. Well, if you change your mind, let me know."

"I will," he promises.

"It's so typical, you know?" I sigh. "Of all of the jerk slugs to get you, it would have been him."

"Yeah, but, aren't they all jerks?" Jake asks.

Almost without realizing I'm doing so, I run a hand along his hair as I consider this. Sure, Temrash has never shown an ounce of kindness or compassion towards me, but there are voluntary hosts. Are they treated differently?

They have to be. A couple of hours in a room with TV and food can't be the only incentive for not fighting. Right?

Anyway, if you're a Yeerk and you have a host who, somehow, doesn't mind you're there, wouldn't you treat them with something similar to decency? Not that you'd give them control or anything extreme like that, but you'd probably leave them alone as far as torture goes.

As though reading my thoughts, Jake speaks up again.

"Chapman agreed to protect his daughter," he tells me, like he's just remembered it after awhile. "After his wife became voluntary."

"Yeah?" I glance at Jake, but I can only make out the outline of his face from the light of the TV. "Where'd you hear that?"

"Rachel," Jake explains. "When she morphed their cat, to spy on them."

"Did it work?" I wonder. "Is she still free?"

Jake nods again. "Visser Three wanted Melissa infested that night, but the slug inside Chapman's head let him talk. Together, they managed to convince him to let her stay free. The Yeerk said that Chapman would fight him and make him twitch and stuff. Make people think he'd gone crazy, and lose his job."

"Says more in favor of our principal than the slug," I note. "But, since he spoke up for Chapman, I guess the slug can't be totally evil."

"Yeah. Temrash is. Was," Jake corrects.

I just pull Jake into my arms. "Was. And if there's a hell, I bet it makes the fugue look fun."

Jake manages a laugh. "Hope so."

We lay there for awhile in silence. I feel Homer's fur resting on Jake, and the dog start to snore. Just as I think Jake's asleep, he speaks again.

"Tom?"

His voice is shaky. It's taken on that tone I know, when he's trying to muster up the courage to ask me something that he doesn't want to know the answer to, but needs to know the answer to. And he knows that, almost all of the time, he's not going to like the answer I'll give him.

"Yeah?"

I keep my voice level, not flippant, but not...

Well, you know.

"The slug told me he tortured you for over ten hours. When you fought him at the barbecue..."

Jake doesn't actually ask the question, but I know what he means.

It's also, thankfully, one of those few times when the truth matches what he wants to know.

Well, mostly.

I turn on my side, facing him. Shake my head before answering with words.

"He was furious, but he was also amused. He gloated, because, honestly, as hard as I tried, it was a pretty wimpy result. I mean, I couldn't even manage to shake my head fully, let alone speak. I barely made my face move." I squeeze Jake's shoulder. "He gloated for hours about how weak I was and how soon I was going to break completely. But, no, he didn't replay any horrible memories."

What I don't say, although Jake probably guesses at, is that torturing your host takes a lot of effort. It's not like a computer, where you press a few buttons and a program loads. It's not exactly tiring for the Yeerk, but it takes concentration. In a way, it's almost an art. You need to know your host really well to find the memories that will cause the most harm, and be able to locate them and replay them...it takes practice.

That evening, Temrash was playing the good host (ha) for Jake and his friends, representing The Sharing. Then, he was playing the devoted Yeerk at the full members meeting.

Also, he wasn't exactly known for his ability to multi-task.

Jake's nodding, takes several deep breaths.

"Did he...a lot?" he asks.

I consider the question, and my answer, for the better part of a minute. "Well, he'd definitely mock me and replay bad memories each day just because he could. Or, if he was bored and needing some...entertainment, as he called it. He loved to watch me squirm. At the same time, Midget, he knew that if he kept it up too much, too constant, I'd get used to it. He'd lose his power. Anyway, he figured I'd break either way and be, as he called it, 'less fun', so he wanted to get enough mileage while he could."

I realize I've said too much when tears start to fall down Jake's face.

Then again, I couldn't really lie about something like that.

I hug him tighter. "You probably had the worst three days than I ever did," I tell him, hoping this reassures him a little. "Even the worst one day. And you made it. I'm proud of you. You're a really, really strong kid."

Jake smiles, then yawns. "Yeah. Okay." He pauses, then adds, "I think I'm going to try to sleep. I still have to go to school tomorrow, and all."

"I'll turn off the TV, then," I offer, giving him a smile.

Jake nods, then yawns again.

I know that Mom and Dad would probably let him miss a third day of school, but I'm glad that he's going to try to bite the bullet.

Anyway, if he doesn't seem like himself, he can always say he's not completely over the flu.

Over time, healing will follow.

I don't want to promise him this, though. Even if it's true, I can't exactly compare my experience with his, and if it takes longer than he expects...

No. I'll be there for Jake, I'll take care of him to the point of babying him, but I won't make any promises about when he'll be back to his regular self.

"Jake," I tell him, instead. "I'm here, though. I'm always here."

Jake manages a smile. "Thanks, Tom."

When we wake up the next day, Jake's determined to go to school.

"It's not like I can put it off for more than a day or so, and I'll just have more work to catch up on," he tells me.

He's right, which I tell him.

"Yeah, it will probably be harder the longer you put it off," I agree.

Anyway, Jake does look a little better than the day before, but I'm glad he has the "recovering from the flu" excuse in case anyone notices that something's off.

Naturally, I give him a huge hug before he leaves for the day. When he returns, he seems a little more himself than he was that morning. School was probably a good distraction. More so than mindless daytime TV.

"You want any help with your homework?" I ask.

He shakes his head. "I think I've got it." After a pause, he adds, "Okay if I start here?"

"You want some company that aren't Mom and Dad hovering over you?" I tease.

Jake laughs, just a little. "It's worse when I'm by myself," he admits.

I nod, understanding. "Sure. I'll do some work, too, so we can suffer together."

He laughs for real. "Thanks."

I tousle his hair, and we work in silence for a couple of hours. Then, it's time for dinner, and after that, we hang out and watch TV with Tobias. A half an hour later, our parents keep us company for a popular sitcom, and they take turns sitting next to Jake. Basically, Mom takes the first shift next to Jake, then has to use the bathroom at the the midway commercial break, and Dad takes her place for the rest of the show.

Smooth, parents.

Afterwards, it's about time for bed. Jake changes into PJs-well, a large night shirt and boxers, tonight-and we (plus Homer) curl up on my couch bed together. He has another awful nightmare again, but I'm there to comfort him until he can fall asleep.

For the next couple of weeks, some variation of the above events take place. When it's time for bed, Jake and Homer sleep with next to me. Always, Jake wakes up from nightmares. His screams wake me up, but there's no way I'm letting him sleep alone until he's at least mostly himself again. I'm also not about to complain about losing a few hours of sleep. The first few days, it's almost a battle for him to be able to fall back asleep. Not that I blame him, since he knows what's awaiting him, but I'd like to think that even sleep with nightmares is better than no sleep at all.

Also, after the first few days, Jake soon realizes that once he gets the nightmare "out of the way"-in his words-he'll be okay for the rest of the night. So, almost like clockwork, me, Jake, and Homer all go to bed around 9, 9:30. At 1:00AM, Jake's screaming bloody murder, and I'm always there. I hold him, comfort him, and rub his back until he finally falls back asleep. Then, around 6:30, we're both up, and he's apologizing for having woken me up.

"Maybe, I can try to sleep upstairs," he offers on the third morning, which is a Friday.

And wake Mom and Dad and Tobias, instead of me. Who can't make up the lost sleep during the day. Not that I say this. Not that they would, either.

Anyway, I can be there for Jake when he wakes up. I can comfort him and stay with him.

"If you want," I answer instead. Trying to keep the doubt out of my voice.

Jake thinks for a minute, then shakes his head. "They'll worry."

"Yeah. They don't hear as much, down here. And, since I already know...I can relate," I reassure him.

"It's just..." Jake frowns. "I mean, aren't you sick of being woken up in the middle of the night?"

I manage a smile. "Honestly? I'm more fed up with that slug for putting you through that. Unfortunately, he's already dead, so it's not like we can kill him twice, or even threaten to." I sigh, overly dramatic, on purpose. "I'm still holding out hope that he's in hell."

Jake laughs. "Can't say I blame you, there."

I place my hands on Jake's shoulders. "Hey. I meant what I promised. I'm here for you, Jake. If you want to sleep in your room, or on the couch in the living room, that's fine. But, if you're doing it so that I'll sleep better, don't. Of all the people here, I'm the only one who can take a nap during the day. Besides, like I said, I've been through what you have. And I want to be there for you."

Jake nods, clearly convinced. "I want you to be there. When I wake up from a nightmare with him. Is that...weak?"

"No. It's human. You're a kid, recovering from something no one should ever have to go through. Well, maybe minus some serial killers and child abusers. Point is, there's going to be some stress, trauma, afterwards. And I want to help you through that, Jake," I answer.

Jake smiles at me. "Okay."

"Okay," I echo. "Then, it's settled. You're staying with me. For as long as you want. A week, a month, the rest of the war and beyond. And you're going to get a back rub whenever you wake me up from a bad dream."

Jake rolls his eyes at the last part. "Is that supposed to be motivation for me to wake you up?"

I tousle his hair. "I refuse to dignify that remark with a comment. Now, you better get dressed before you miss the bus. Oh, and Jake? Ask Mom if she can get more Cheerios the next time she's at the market? Between you, me, and Tobias, they're disappearing like crazy."

Jake gives me another hug and promises to relay my message.

That afternoon, when Jake comes downstairs to visit me after school, he seems...off. More tense than that morning, at least. I don't want to push him, and it could have nothing to do with recovering from being infested, but I have a feeling it's got something to do with that.

At least, it's a Friday. He doesn't have to do any homework if he's not up to it.

He barely manages a half smile when he sees me. "Hi, Tom."

"Hey, Midget." I smile at him. "School okay?"

He shrugs. "Yeah, it was fine."

I move to hug Jake, which is obviously a regular occurrence, but he stiffens. I step back.

Hanging his head, Jake looks at the ground. "Sorry."

"Jake? Are you okay?" I ask, gently.

Jake sighs, then sort of shakes his head. "Can we talk?"

A year ago, I would have responded to that question with a somewhat sarcastic but not cruel remark, something like, "Isn't that what we're doing now?"

Even a week ago, I might have said the same thing. Now, it just feels insensitive, at best.

"You bet," I answer instead, with what I hope is a reassuring smile. "Want to sit down?"

He nods, and we take a seat on the couch, facing each other. Jake sits sort of hunched over, legs up against his chest. Not a good sign. I lean closer, wanting to show support without crowding him.

Jake starts to speak a couple of times, then cuts himself off. If his infestation hadn't only been for a few days, and, more importantly, if I hadn't seen him hold coherent conversations with me and my parents in the four days since, I would have worried. It's the kind of thing that you see-not that I've witnessed it personally-from long broken involuntary hosts whose Yeerks are feeding. Among other things, they've forgotten how to speak on their own.

"It's okay," I murmur, soothingly. I reach out and put a hand on his shoulder. "Take your time."

Jake takes a deep breath, then lets it out. "You know what happens when a Yeerk dies?"

I frown, just a little. "Ax told me that they go through this thing called the fugue. It's really painful for them." I pause, considering this. "Did it hurt you, too?"

Jake shakes his head. "I was aware of his pain, but I didn't feel any of it. Also, by then, he was too weak to torture me, so between those two things, I was glad."

Even though Jake's just admitted to feeling some pleasure at the suffering of another sentient creature, I can't say I blame him. However horribly Temrash treated me, I'm sure that Jake had it worse during those three days.

Knowing that the torture was finished, and that his torturer was in agony...

Yeah. I don't blame him.

"I would be, too," I reassure him. "That slug was pure scum. No, that's an insult to actual scum."

Jake laughs. "Probably, yeah." He takes another deep breath, then continues. "Well, when the Yeerk dies, their host gets all of their memories."

"I think I remember hearing that before, actually," I recall. "Did it hurt?"

Jake shakes his head. "It was like he was uploading a computer file to my brain, kind of. It didn't hurt. But, Tom, um, you were his last host."

It takes a few seconds for me to get the meaning at what Jake's saying.

Jake mumbles, "I'm sorry." at the same time I reply with a sincere, "I hope it wasn't too awful for you, Midget."

We stare at each other, registering what each of us has just said.

I speak first, once it's clear that Jake's not going to talk before I do.

Which is good, because I am flat out confused.

"Wait. Why are you sorry?"

Jake looks at me, swallowing hard. "I saw your memories, Tom. I got stuff that was personal, that I had no right to see. I-I didn't want to see any of it, I swear. It was coming, whether I wanted to or not. I couldn't hide from it!"

He looks so miserable, so ashamed, that I just wrap my arms around him. Jake lets me, practically melts into me, as we sit with my arms around him in a backwards hug.

"It's okay," I tell him, gently, after a few minutes. "I mean it, Jake. It's okay."

"I invaded your privacy," he insists, voice shaky.

I hug him tighter, then gently turn my kid brother so that he's facing me. He won't look at me, though.

"Hey. Midget. Look at me, okay?" I plead with him.

His eyes raise, meeting mine, but he remains silent.

"After the worst three days of your life," I begin, working hard to keep the anger from my voice, "that slug dies and basically forces all of his memories from the hosts he's infested and abused on your mind. As though you hadn't been through enough from that total slime ball. Not only that, one of those former hosts was your big brother, who, if I'm not totally crazy, you don't completely hate. Right?"

The last part gets a grin from Jake, which was my intent.

"Yeah." He nods at me. "I definitely don't hate you, Tom."

I give him a little nudge. "The feeling's mutual. Besides, you had no choice in it. You even tried to fight it...which, by the way, I wouldn't have expected you to do. Not after all you'd just been through, okay? If you'd chosen to just accept it, to endure this memory transfer, I wouldn't blame you and I definitely wouldn't accuse you of invading my privacy. The fact that you tried to fight..." I pause, and he nods. "Look, when you freed me, Temrash had already infested me for over four months. He'd hurt me, and he'd not only seen all of my memories, he intentionally used them to hurt me. On a regular basis. As far as violating my privacy goes, he's got the reward for that. Whatever you saw doesn't come close. Besides-"

Jake interrupts me. "It wasn't all awful, Tom. What he gave me, from you. I kind of liked seeing some of it."

Then, he turns away, clearly ashamed.

I try to imagine what memories stuck with Temrash. Because, I find it hard to believe that he would have been able to import my entire life into Jake's mind. Probably, it was just the memories that, well, he remembered. The ones that stuck.

There had to be good ones, right? My life before him had been a good life. Sure, I'd been yelled at by my parents, grounded on occasion, and had my embarrassing moments and made my mistakes. Like any other human being. At the same time, I was sure that at least some good events in my life had to stick with him.

"The good memories?" I ask, gently. "I mean, even with that slug, I can't imagine he completely erased anything good from my life before him from his puny brain."

Jake turns back to me, encouraged. "Yeah. I saw...you shooting your first basket. You were eight, I think? When you were ten, we were at this amusement park and you begged me to ride the tallest roller coaster with you. I did, and it was incredible." I'm smiling, and Jake continues, tentatively at first, then, with something like relief or maybe happiness. "I saw you make the team the first time, and your first game. When we played hide and seek with Dad. We hid in the laundry basket in your room. He caught us by pretending to leave the room, and when we got out, he jumped out and surprised us." Jake outright grins at the last one. "They weren't all bad."

I hold him close, again. "We had some great times as kids, huh?"

Jake nods, relaxing against me. "You were always a great big brother, Tom. Still are."

"Well, you're an incredible little brother, Midget," I tell him. "I'm proud of you."

"Thanks." Jake lets out a deep breath. "I just wish I didn't have to see them."

"It's okay," I tell him, again. "Besides, if it was physically possible for me to share those memories with you, I would have. You don't need to feel guilty about any of it."

"Thanks, Tom," Jake repeats.

We're quiet for a little, just holding each other. Well, I'm holding Jake, anyway. I'm glad he's feeling better about things, but I also wonder about the less than positive memories he saw.

"Jake?" I ask, tentatively. "Is there anything that you saw that upset you? That you want to talk about?"

Jake nods, like he's been waiting for this. "Yeah. I saw why you joined The Sharing. And how you kept going to meetings, because of that girl. How you thought she was seeing someone else, so you burst in on a full members only meeting and saw Visser Three."

In an attempt at humor, I joke, "Yeah, and I'm still ticked off that you didn't let me fight him at the pool. You know I could have taken him."

"He was morphing something that had multiple heads and threw fire!" Jake protested.

"So? I can run pretty fast," I tease him. "I could have kicked him where the sun don't shine, and he would have gone down. Fire breathing heads or not. Can you imagine how that would have gone over in future history classes? See, this former Controller, Tom, he goes right up to Visser Three and kicks him in the nuts. He falls flat on the floor, unconscious. Every caged Controller escapes, goes to the news, and with that, the military takes over and the war ends. All because Tom kicked Visser Three where the sun don't shine." I give Jake a playful shove. "I could have won you the war then and there, Midget."

Jake rolls his eyes in response. "You're going to hold that over on me for the rest of my life."

I run a hand over his hair. "Oh, you bet."

Jake just laughs. "You know that history teachers would never get away with using the word 'nuts' in that way."

"They can figure out what to say so that the kids get it," I promise.

Jake curls up closer to me, and I tighten my arms around him.

After a few minutes, I speak up because, as painful as it is to recall, it's definitely something that Temrash relished seeing in my brain, and he made me relive it more times than I can count. I'm sure that it was included in his memory transfer to Jake.

"Jake," I begin, "did you see, um, what happened after I burst in on the meeting?"

Jake nods. "They tied you up, but you fought like crazy. Even as they dragged you to the pool. But, then, that slug entered your ear, and I felt your fear, and then...your despair. You kept trying to fight, but..." His breath catches. He takes several breaths, then speaks again. "There was no winning against him. Which he let you know, all the time."

"Yeah. It was rough," I agree. "I kept fighting. Even though I knew there was no hope. Until you guys came and saved me."

I turn him, just a little. Enough so that he's looking at me. "Seriously, Jake. I was running on empty, then. Especially after I tried to warn you, and I wasn't even sure if I'd done anything. I know that I'd be broken now, if I was still his slave. Or any other Yeerk's."

Jake swallowed, hard. "He hurt you so much."

I nod. "And you, Jake. You went through hell, I'm sure."

Jake manages a nod. "Yeah, but I knew it would be over in a couple of days. You didn't."

That's definitely true. "I'm free now. Thanks to you, and your friends."

We're quiet for awhile.

"You really don't mind, Tom?" Jake asks, clearly needing extra reassurance. "That I saw...?"

I move him so that he's facing me, again. He doesn't resist.

"I promise," I reassure him, voice firm. "It's okay. Really. And, look, it's not like you need to push those memories to the back of your head. They're yours, now."

Jake nods. "They weren't all bad."

"I'd hope not!" I laugh. "Up until the slugs invaded, we had pretty a pretty good life."

He grins. "I can't believe you tried to cheat on that History test."

I give him another nudge in the ribs. "Oh, please. Like you've never cheated before."

"I'm pleading the fifth on that one," Jake retorts.

I roll my eyes, and Jake grins, rolling his eyes back at me.

Then, without meaning to, he yawns.

"Tired?" I ask.

Jake nods. "Yeah. It's been a long week."

I glance at the clock. There's still a couple more hours before dinner, and I know that Mom will bring a tray downstairs if Jake's not up by the time she calls.

"Why don't you rest for awhile?" I suggest, gently.

"Yeah, I think I will." Jake looks at me. "Um, is here okay?"

"Duh, Midget."

I remove a couple of blankets and proceed to tuck Jake in, which gets me another eye roll, but he also smiles, so I know he doesn't mind.

I leave the couch to get a book from one of the shelves, since I've had enough homework for today. When I return, Jake's eyes are closed, his breathing slow, and I almost think he's fallen asleep.

Then, he speaks up.

"Thanks, Tom," he murmurs. "For...understanding."

"You're welcome, Jake," I answer, tucking the blankets around him more securely. "And, any time you want to talk...my door is open."

He nods. "Thank you." Then, "I'm so glad it's Friday. I've been catching up on homework all week."

"And you didn't have a weekend to relax last time, either," I observe, moving some stray hair out of his face.

"Yeah, seriously," he sighs. "But, there's no Yeerk activity this weekend. Hey, you know, Dad showed me an article that the clinic wouldn't be opening? It was really short."

"Still say you should have used dynamite on it," I tease.

"Looking back, it wouldn't have been the worst idea," Jake admits. "Except for the whole problem of finding the dynamite."

"Can't help you there," I sigh. "Sorry."

"Maybe next time," Jake teases me.

"You bet," I promise.

Ten minutes later, he's fast asleep. Even snoring, a little. 

A couple of hours later, as I suspected, Mom arrives with a tray containing both of our dinners, and we talk for a couple of minutes. I know that she and Dad will be back later. Jake wakes up a few minutes after she leaves, and begins to eat. I join him, and it's quiet, but not in a weird way.

Yeah. Slowly, will get back to normal. Well, our version of normal.

Soon enough, Jake's nightmares go down from every night to once a week, which is pretty standard for the leader of the Animorphs.

Then, because nothing can ever stay even that version of normal for long, we meet the Ellimist.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You might be wondering about the validity of Jake receiving memories from Tom that weren't specifically included at the end of "The Capture". There, Jake receives memories from Tom, but he only tells us about his brother joining The Sharing and his infestation. 
> 
> However, earlier in the book, Temrash shows him a memory of Tom's point of view of a seemingly mundane conversation with Jake, so we know that there must be more memories that Jake received that he doesn't tell us. In my personal opinion, the fact that we only get the memory of Tom's Sharing experience and his infestation is either poor writing or--perhaps--poor advice on the part of KAA's editors. After all, how difficult would it have been to include a few lines about Tom's childhood or interactions with Jake before he became a Controller? I decided to incorporate these into the aftermath of Jake's infestation, because I believe that he would feel guilt about being privy to Tom's memories--even if he didn't want to receive them.
> 
> As you might be able to imagine, there's a completely different tone here than there was in the book. I wonder if, as early as "The Capture", Jake wondered if Tom would spend the entire war as a slave in his mind. Which, up until the existence of the Chee and the Hork-Bajir Valley, both of which COULD have been places of refuge for a free!Tom, there wasn't much way of getting Tom out and keeping him free. So, a part of him would have been happy to get the memories of his brother, as a way of him living on in Jake's mind and life, even if he initially dreaded the experience.
> 
> Here, everything has changed. Tom's free, so Jake receiving his memories is not a way of carrying his brother inside him, but a type of violation of Tom's mind. Not that Jake wanted this to happen, nor had any way of preventing it, but the fact remains that he has a lot more knowledge of his older brother than Tom might have wanted him to have. Involuntary or not, it's still one of the most extreme invasions of privacy. This has to be addressed, and Jake has to feel some level of guilt about it--again, warranted or not. 
> 
> In addition to needing to heal from being a Controller for three days to Temrash (and you can be sure that his experience in my fanfic was, at least, ten times worse than in the book), he has to deal with his own guilt at being the recipient of Tom's memories.
> 
> Fortunately, Tom's a very good older brother, and can help Jake through this process.


	4. Chapter 4

After I was freed from being infested by Tom's old Yeerk, we all agreed to take a short break from fighting the Yeerks. Not that we were quitting the war or anything, but like Ax told us, you can't fight battles all the time. We'd burn out, and it wasn't like there was a backup group of Animorphs or Andalites ready to take over.

Not yet, anyway.

For a couple of weeks, I just tried to recover. Tried to get through each day and each night, hoping that the nightmares featuring Tom's slug would disappear.

Tom was amazing during the whole time. He'd always been my big brother, someone who had never picked on me, someone I had always respected and completely trusted. He had always been my role model. Things had changed after he'd been freed from the Yeerks. Not that he'd been moody or anything like that, but he'd known that his life was going to be a lot more-well, basically, he was in hiding until the Andalites came back. Not that he moped about it. If anything, he'd tell me how great it was to be able to move on his own, to talk on his own, and to eat what he wanted. Tom even compared himself to Anne Frank. Still, we all knew that this wasn't exactly an ideal situation, but it was the only way Tom would be able to remain free until the Yeerks lost.

Anyway, like I said. When I got infested, with his old Yeerk, well...it was awful. Worse than anything I could have imagined. Tom knew this. Obviously. He'd had firsthand experience, not just with Yeerks, but with that slug who took over my brain. Afterwards...things were rough. Call it shock or whatever, but having gone through that, I wasn't myself. Tom totally understood. He let me stay with him in the basement, and would be there when I woke him up with my screaming. He never got angry or even annoyed at me. He would just be there for me, ready if I needed to talk, or hug me, or just watch mindless TV with me if I wasn't ready.

If I had any doubts before that I had the world's best big brother, I didn't anymore.

If it weren't for Tom, I'd probably still be a mess. Not that I didn't still have nightmares, but, let's face it, nightmares were a pretty regular thing for all of us, ever since this war began. For me, though, after I was freed, nightmares shifted from a once or twice a week occurrence to a nightly occurrence. Staying with Tom, he knew this, and he helped me.

It took a few weeks, but I eventually got back to normal. Well, as normal as I could be, given that I was a kid fighting an alien army.

The break from fighting definitely helped all of us, but it wasn't like we could leave the Yeerks alone forever. Short breaks were one thing, and no one expected us to invade the Yeerk Pool and fight them every day. Still, I knew, they were getting stronger. They were gaining more humans as hosts, and I was sure that at least some of them were voluntary. After being a slave to Temrash 114 for three days, I really couldn't understand how anyone could agree to being a host to a Yeerk, but I'd seen the voluntary area with my own eyes, and the outlines of people there.

It was Marco and Tobias who came up with the idea of going back to the Yeerk Pool. Finding the Kandrona, which was even more important to the Yeerks than the pool itself, and destroying it.

All of us sat in the basement, including Tom. At one point, we might have used Cassie's barn as our hideout, but Tom wanted to know what was going on, and since our parents already knew about our fight and Cassie's didn't, it just made more sense for us to use a place that was already secure.

We mostly kept my parents out of our meetings. It was great that I didn't have to hide this part of my life from them, but they didn't need to know the nitty gritty details about how we planned to use our morphs to attack the Yeerks.

Even Tom was kind of freaked out by it all, but not enough to not want to be there. He kind of insisted on it. He pointed out that there wasn't much he could provide, but he had some experience with seeing how their brains worked, and he'd also witnessed more than a couple of Visser Three's morphs. We'd take any inside information we could get.

Since we all had a pretty decent sized collection of morphs at this point, we didn't need to worry as much about neighbors seeing a group of people enter the house at once. Also, Rachel was my cousin and lived nearby, and Marco was my best friend, so both of them could come and go without drawing suspicion. Even Cassie was Rachel's best friend, so her coming to our house with her wasn't a big deal.

The main thing was to stagger when everyone came. Or just morph insects and come inside when the other person had already opened the door.

Not ants, though. We'd had a bad experience with that morph.

The fact that Tom and my parents knew made everything a lot easier for me. Tobias, too, since he didn't have to live with his awful uncle. But, we'd decided early on that they should be the only ones of our parents to find out.

It was just safer that way. Marco's dad had gotten a lot better, but he wouldn't stay that way if he found out about Marco and his wife being the host of Visser One. At least, that's what Marco told me. As for Rachel, how could we tell her mom without her needing to warn her kids to stay out of The Sharing? What could she tell her kids that wouldn't make them, at some point, slip up and tell at least one of their friends?

As for Cassie's parents, Tom couldn't be sure that he'd never seen them at Sharing events or at the Yeerk Pool. We weren't entirely sure that someone needed to be a member of The Sharing in order to be a Controller. Sure, full members of The Sharing were definitely Controllers, but were all Controllers members of The Sharing? It seemed like an easy slip up for the Yeerks to make. All you needed was a list of every member of The Sharing, and then you'd have a list of all of the Controllers on the planet.

Besides, the failed clinic had planned to infest the governor, and every patient who entered its walls. Would they have all become Sharing members?

We just didn't know. Also, we didn't have someone on the inside who we could ask. So, we had to rely on secrecy.

If this felt overly unfair to Cassie and Rachel and Marco, knowing that Tobias and I had our parents and Tom as emotional support, they didn't say anything to us. Probably because we all knew that it was unfair, but that was how our lives would be, now.

Anyway. Better to have two adults as allies than none, right?

Back to that meeting. We decided to go back to the Yeerk Pool and try to locate the Kandrona. From there, we would figure out a way to destroy it. Nice and easy.

Except for the fact that Ax didn't know what every Kandrona in existence looked like, only that their size could vary based on the needs of the Yeerks using it. A Kandrona could be the size of a car, or it could be larger than our house. We just didn't know.

Which meant that we had to be on the lookout at the Yeerk Pool for anything that could serve as the powerhouse for the Yeerks.

A couple of hours later, when I was a roach stuck on the tongue of a Taxxon, my first thought that entered my head was was that my parents would have no body to bury.

That was when the Ellimist showed up.

The choice was a simple one. Abandon ship and be given a new planet to populate, with our families and some other humans for more DNA selection. Sure, Adam and Eve might have populated the Earth by themselves over hundreds of years, if you took every word in the Bible literally, but the Ellimist clearly wanted to jump start the process. He claimed that staying meant the destruction of the planet by the Yeerks.

I guessed we ended up dying as a Taxxon snack, and the Andalites were too late to save the rest of the humans.

He told us we'd be asked the question again, and we all said no the first time.

After we demorphed and got the hell out of that hell hole, I couldn't help but think that Tom would tease me relentlessly about being inside the jaws of a Taxxon.

Not that I'd blame him. Had it been him fighting and me on the sidelines, I totally would have given into the temptation to tease him about nearly being Taxxon food at any opportunity.

On the way home, I still felt the gooeyness of the Taxxon saliva on my body. The stench.

We all felt the same way. As we walked home-morphing birds of prey would be too exhausting-we alternated between joking about how many showers we'd need to take, and what to do about the Ellimist's offer.

"Should we tell your parents?" Tobias asked me, right before we split up.

"It's not like he told us not to," I answered, shrugging.

The others hovered around my door.

"What do you think they'll want us to do?" Cassie asked.

She'd been in favor of accepting the Ellimist's offer.

I shrugged. "Probably take him up on it."

Not that they have an official vote.

Really, though, Tom's opinion almost mattered to me more than my mom or dad's.

Okay, not "almost".

He'd been infested longer than I had. He'd known the despair of the Yeerk Pool, of having that filthy slug crawl into his head, torture him...

"Jake?" Marco asked, grabbing my shoulder. "Are you okay?"

I realized I'd been shaking.

I forced myself to nod, to take a deep breath and then let it out. And again.

"I was thinking about...you know. Him."

No one was outside, but that didn't mean that there weren't eyes and ears around.

They all nodded in understanding. Marco squeezed my shoulder.

"Look, we got out alive, this time. Let's take a day to recover, think things over. Meet back at my place tomorrow, okay?" I suggested.

More nods, and they took off. I turned to Tobias.

"You want to shower first?" I offered, as I opened the door. Jokingly, I added, "You can let me know how long it takes to get the smell off."

Tobias laughed. "You're assuming it's not like skunk spray, and it goes away after just one wash."

"Yeah, well. Call me cautiously hopeful." I frowned. "Maybe, we should morph and demorph before trying to get it out."

Tobias shrugged. "Can't make it much worse."

Mom and Dad were waiting for us in the kitchen. Tom, of course, would get an update once we headed to the basement.

"How'd things go...and WHAT is that smell?" Mom asked, reaching out her arms to hug me, and then immediately stepping back.

"Um, Taxxon...insides," Tobias piped up.

Dad raised an eyebrow. "There are two ways that could be taken. Please tell me it's not..."

"It's the worse one," I confirmed. "Look, we know we smell awful, and we're definitely going to need to shower, but we're hoping that if we morph, that will fix some of it."

Mom paled, but nodded, and Dad just looked pained.

Turning to Tobias, I asked, "Homer and Dude?"

"Definitely," he agreed.

Looking back, we could have just acquired and morphed each other, but even though we didn't morph sentient beings without their permission-and we would have had each other's permission-it would have still felt a little weird.

I concentrated on Homer, and Tobias focused on his former pet cat. Somewhere in my mind, I hoped Dude was okay.

The dog morph was a familiar one, and I welcomed the simple happiness and playfulness of his mind. When I saw Tobias, I barked, and he hissed in response.

(Hey!) I laughed, backing away from him. (It's just me.)

(I know, I know!) he answered, his tone playful. (I just figured, you being a dog and me being a cat? I had to play the part.)

(Does the cat really hate me?) I wondered, giving into the urge to roll over on the floor.

(Nope, but he's definitely cautious. That's how cats are. Independent, and cautious of other creatures invading their space,) Tobias explained. (Takes awhile to earn their trust, and since we only have their DNA and not their memories, it's not like they're going to remember each time we morph them.)

(Yeah, good point. Okay, I'm going to demorph and hope that some of the smell is gone. You going to stay kitty for awhile?) I asked, teasingly.

(No, I'll demorph, too,) Tobias decided.

A few minutes later, we were both human. Mom and Dad approached us with caution.

"Well, the smell's definitely gone, but I'd still shower," Dad suggested, with a laugh.

"Oh, that was always the plan," I agreed.

Tobias went first, and about fifteen minutes later, he emerged from the bathroom, wearing a pair of jeans and a t-shirt.

"Thanks. Let Tom we're okay, and I'll be down soon?" I asked him.

"Sure thing. Do you want me to stay, or...?" Tobias trailed off.

"Up to you. But, we'll tell him what happened together, okay? Before Mom and Dad," I added. "I think he'll handle it better than they will."

Tobias nodded, knowingly. "You're probably right."

Twenty minutes later, I headed downstairs to the basement, where Tom was working on some problem sets from his Biology textbook, and Tobias was working on some kind of English assignment. Tom had told me a few days ago that he was up to the section on genetic mutations, and according to the syllabus, he was where he needed to be this far in the year. I was pretty impressed that he was keeping up with school, but I guessed he had a lot of hours to fill.

As soon as Tom saw me, he stood up, crossed the few steps, and enfolded me into a giant bear hug. He'd always hugged me before and after missions, and I'd always complained that he'd crushed my ribs afterwards.

Like calling me "Midget", it was kind of our thing, now.

It wasn't true. The part about my ribs, I mean. Which he knew.

Anyway, Tom's hug lasted the better part of a minute, and I could tell by the scent of his shampoo (and still damp hair) that he'd been exercising earlier. Probably, he'd started as soon as I left. I knew it was hard for him, me fighting these battles and risking my life, while he couldn't do anything except stay safe. Probably even harder since I got infested.

No, definitely not "probably".

It was.

I let go first, like I always did, and then Tom sort of steered me over to the massive couch he used for a bed.

"Sit down," he urged, keeping an arm around my shoulder. "Tell me everything that happened."

I sighed, then turned to Tobias. He nodded at me, encouragingly.

"It was more or less a bust. We got into the cafeteria as roaches, and nearly got eaten alive by Taxxons," I began.

Tom frowned. "How 'nearly'?"

"Um...we were in their mouths," I admitted.

Tom's eyebrows shot up. "How'd you escape?"

Tobias and I took turns, telling him about the Ellimist and how time froze. The choice we had to make. That we said no, but he'd be back to ask us again. Finally, how we returned to our regular time, demorphed, and got the hell out of there.

Tom looked...concerned.

"People saw humans come out of a Taxxon body?" he questioned, looking at me, then at Tobias.

"Yeah," he answered, in a small voice. "They saw that."

"It was pretty quick," I added. "I don't think they saw us demorph."

But Tobias shook his head. "If word gets to Visser Three..."

Tom chewed on his lip. "He's convinced you guys are Andalites. If anyone says otherwise, he'll either threaten to kill them, or kill them outright. No matter what evidence there is to the contrary."

"I know it wasn't the smartest move," I admitted. "But I'm not sure what else we could have done."

"Aside from not get swallowed up by Taxxons?" Tom teased, giving me a nudge in the ribs.

I raised my hands in surrender. "In all fairness, roach senses don't exactly pick up Taxxon mouths. But yeah. We'll have to be extra careful if we use those morphs again."

"Especially at the Yeerk Pool," Tom added, giving me a stern look.

Then, he hugged me again, harder than before.

Like, this time, I really wondered if my ribs were crushed.

Well, just for a second.

After he let me go, he gave Tobias a squeeze on the shoulder. Tobias was...he didn't much like to be touched, and I was pretty sure it had to do with his awful childhood. Still, over the past few months with us, he was definitely starting to enjoy it more, and we took it slow with him. I mean, it's not like he'd suddenly start liking hugs if we forced them on him.

"The real question is, what to do about the Ellimist's offer," I reminded Tom, once I was sure that I could breathe okay.

"Do Mom and Dad have any opinions?" Tom prodded.

"We didn't tell them, yet," Tobias explained.

Tom sighed. "Okay. Better bring them downstairs."

"Tobias? Do you mind?" I asked.

"No problem. Um, do you want them to come down immediately, or do you and Tom want to talk?" he asked me.

I glanced at Tom, who gave me a little nod. "We could probably use some time to talk."

Tobias grinned at us. "Sure thing. I'll finish the English homework, then ask them to come down."

Once Tobias left, Tom pulled me into yet another hug. At least, this one didn't almost render me almost without the ability to breathe.

"To-om!" I complained, once he finally let go. "I'm okay, all right? I'm alive!"

"Hey." He put his hands on my shoulders, looking me right in the eyes. "I get worried, Midget, okay? You might be the leader of an army fighting alien slugs, but you're still my kid brother." Then, he added, "But I promise not to physically suffocate you with my massive hugs."

"Fair enough," I grumbled, rubbing my ribs for emphasis. "You know you're at least a foot taller than me, Tom. You could still easily put me in a headlock and given me a major noogie."

Tom grinned. "No, I reserve that for extreme circumstances."

"Like refusing hugs?" I guessed.

He just tousled my hair. "Find out at your own peril, Midget."

Smiling a little, I leaned against him. Tom wrapped an arm around me, and I turned, just enough to face him.

"It's-it's hard, you know?" I began, my voice a little higher than I would have liked. "Being the leader is one thing. A lot is just keeping an eye out for information and figuring out the best plan of attack. Staying alive while trying to do some small amount of harm to the Yeerks. But this? I mean, it's like we're bailing out, but if we're gonna lose either way..."

I felt my voice catch, and went quiet.

Tom wrapped his other arm around me, but still managed to face me. "I can't tell you how much I hate all of this. You're a kid, Jake. You shouldn't have to be making these decisions. No one should, but least of all, you. You don't even have your learner's permit yet."

"I managed to drive okay that one time," I protested.

"Tell me," Tom asked, teasingly, "how many trash cans and driveways did you hit before you officially totaled it?"

I winced at the memory. "Uh...let's just say it's a good thing Dad knew he'd never use it again."

Tom just laughed. "Hope that doesn't put you off driving for the rest of your life."

"I've been through worse," I pointed out. "Anyway, I have bird morphs that can go way faster than the speed limit around here."

"Yeah, but you still need to learn how to morph real clothes. Not just those spandex leotards," Tom quipped.

I shrugged. "It's better than nothing at all. But, yeah. That's definitely on the list of stuff to figure out. You know, once we get a few weeks of Yeerk free activity, and no homework..."

"Yeah, yeah, I get it." Tom wrapped his arms around me again. "Not exactly on the same level of importance as destroying the Kandrona."

"That's assuming we're not packing up for some strange planet before then," I noted, relaxing against Tom. It was felt kind of nice to be this close to him. I felt...protected. Like he wouldn't let anything happen to me. After a minute, I prodded, "Tom? You never told me what you think of this."

Tom sighed. "When I was a Controller, if you told me that there would be a resistance but they would high tail it out of there just because some seemingly all powerful mystical being who 'doesn't interfere' gave them a ticket out...I'd be more than a little ticked off. But, Midget, it's you. You're my little brother. If we're going to lose either way, then, yeah, I want to make sure I get out while I still can. It's hardly desertion if you and a handful of other people are the difference between a future for humans and no future at all."

"You think we should take the ticket out," I guessed.

Tom sort of shook his head, then sighed again. "I think you're a kid with no military experience fighting a war that you have very little chance of winning. If you stay, you know I'll root for you and I'll be there for you every step that I can be. But, if it's too much and you think this is the best for everyone, then I'll trust you and go with you."

It was my turn to sigh. "So, basically, you will respect either choice I make."

"Yeah, because it's an impossible situation, and because I respect you, Midget," Tom explained.

"You still didn't answer the question," I complained.

Tom was quiet for a few minutes. I stayed curled up against him, really taking the time to enjoy the feeling of his arms around me. His physical support, which clearly echoed his emotional support. What would it have been like, if he'd still been a Controller? If Mom and Dad didn't know, and the six of us had to make this decision by ourselves?

Suddenly, I felt so grateful to Tom. Not that I wasn't before, but I felt this new appreciation for the fact that I, at least, didn't have to hide everything from my family.

Plus, Tom and I had always been close. Until he'd gotten involved with The Sharing, anyway. Even though we still had a lot to deal with, what with me fighting the slugs and him confined to the basement for most of the day, we'd definitely regained our closeness in the weeks that followed me rescuing him.

More proof that Temrash had been doing a pretty awful job playing Tom, and we were all too oblivious to notice.

For only the ten millionth time, I thanked God that I had my real older brother back.

Just when I thought Tom wasn't going to answer my, and when I was feeling so relaxed that it almost didn't matter, he spoke up, his voice quiet. Reflective.

"I'd probably take the ticket. If it were me."

A pang of-guilt? pain?-swept over me.

Because, I realized, if we lost, Tom would either definitely be reinfested or killed. I knew he'd choose death over infestation, and after three days with Temrash, I would have chosen the same. Not that the Yeerks were likely to give us a choice. Visser's Three's actions were always up in the air. As we were rescuing Ax, he basically told us that he was debating between infesting Ax or eating him. While that could have been a bluff, I had a feeling that if he'd been serious about eating Ax instead of using him for an underling, he would have gloated about how he'd eaten his brother.

Not that Visser Three knew that Ax was Elfangor's younger brother. He probably just figured he was a fellow Andalite warrior we had rescued.

Anyway, if we fought and lost, pretty much everything we'd done up until now would be wasted. What would it matter if we'd killed a few hundred of his soldiers (if that) or played a game of cat and mouse if he ended up winning and, more important, the planet ended up losing?

Dying was one thing, but being infested? Knowing Visser Three, he'd infest us first, and then our slugs would make us watch as he-or they-infested our families. I'd scream out in my mind, just like I'd done when I realized I was a Controller, and I'd fight, but I'd be lucky to manage a twitch. My Yeerk would make me watch, and he'd play the scene over and over until I finally died.

"Midget? Jake, breathe!" Tom nearly shouted, placing his arms on my shoulders.

I nodded, trying to inhale, then exhale. Even though I couldn't see my face, I was sure it was red.

After a few attempts, I had my breathing under control. Tom stood behind me, kneading my shoulders, the way he always did after I had a bad dream. Like during those two weeks after Temrash, when Tom had to practically beg me to try to get some sleep. Especially after a nightmare. I closed my eyes, not trusting myself to talk, yet.

"Jake? Are you okay?" Tom asked, still working on my back.

"I-I was thinking about what would happen if we lost," I explained, my voice both high and cracking at the same time. "H-how Visser Three would infest me, then you...all of our families. How the Yeerk would make me watch and-and..." I couldn't finish.

I heard Tom sigh. "Yeah. That would give anyone a panic attack."

"That's what it was?" I wondered.

"Think so. Your face got all red, and I was sure you weren't breathing," Tom explained. "I was sure you were going to pass out."

I was glad Tom couldn't see me. Shame washed over me, then.

"I'm sorry."

I couldn't see Tom, but I was sure that he was rolling his eyes at me. "Like any of this is your fault, Midget."

I closed my eyes, let my shoulders slump forward, and tried to both relax and get a hold of myself. What a baby I was, for falling apart in front of Tom.

As though reading my mind, Tom added, "Hey. You've been through hell. Panic attacks happen. You've got nothing to feel bad about, okay?"

I forced myself to turn, to face Tom, and nod. "Okay."

Tom had stopped rubbing my back when I turned to face him, and now, he just pulled me into another hug. "Hey. It's gonna be okay, Jake."

I wished I could believe him. I reminded myself, again, that nothing was definite. We'd escaped from the Taxxon, right? We hadn't been caught. We were still fighting the war, however badly. Well, that's what happened when you put five kids in charge of an alien invasion. We couldn't even drive, and we were supposed to hold of an army of parasitic alien slugs until the Andalites showed up?

"Maybe we should take the ticket out," I spoke up, quietly, a few minutes later. "Save some of the human race, and all that."

"Like I said," Tom reminded me, his voice gentle. "I wouldn't blame you if you chose that."

Tobias came downstairs then, followed by my parents. They both looked concerned, which was now almost their default expression around myself and Tom. Even though it had been a huge relief to be able to tell them about Elfangor and the Yeerks, not to hide this huge part of my life from them, it kind of meant that they treated both of us with kid gloves.

Whatever those were.

They sat down, Tobias on the other side of me, and my parents on two oversized oldish chairs facing the couch Tom turns into a bed each night. The basement was sort of where our older stuff went, after Mom and Dad decided to replace a piece of furniture or a table. They weren't packrats or anything like that, but if an item still had some actual use, it went down there. Once Tom had to move to the basement, they surreptitiously trashed or recycled anything that was just taking up space. To give Tom more of a place of his own, and more space.

Anyway, Tobias and I took turns telling the story about the roach morph and the Taxxon and the sudden appearance of this Ellimist creature who wanted us to abandon ship and relocate-with our loved ones-to some far off planet.

"We said no the first time, obviously," I admitted, "but he told us he'd ask us again."

Tobias nodded at me, then watched my parents.

Dad spoke first. "Is it possible," he began, "that this was some sort of...near death experience?"

I frowned. "What do you mean, Dad?"

"People often report seeing their loved ones when they are dangerously close to dying. Sometimes, a bright light. A vision of God, often reflective of their personal beliefs," Dad explained. "I, personally, haven't heard any stories from my patients, but I rarely encounter anyone very close to death. Given that you were all extremely near death, that's what this Ellimist was?"

Tobias shook his head. "Time stopped, Steve. Besides, all six of us? Seeing the exact same thing?"

Even though Tobias had been adopted by us almost six months ago, he felt awkward calling my parents "Mom" and "Dad". For awhile, he avoided using anything to identify them, but he slipped once and called Dad "Mr." and then my last name. It had been kind of weird for everyone, and Tobias had apologized at least ten times that day. We had a family discussion later-including Tom-where my parents told Tobias that he was free to call them "Mom" or "Dad" when or if he ever became comfortable doing so, but not to feel any pressure to do so. He'd asked what to call them in the meantime, and they suggested he try out their first names and see how it sounded. Tobias must have felt okay doing this, because it had been "Jean" or "Steve" ever since. Except when he would talk about them to me, and then it was "your mom" or "your dad".

Mom nodded her head. "Once you realize that there are alien slugs trying to take over our planet and any number of other aliens cooperating or fighting them, it's not such a stretch to think there's this advanced race called Ellimists who have the power to freeze time."

Mom, being a writer, would have this view.

Dad raised his hands in mock surrender. "You got me, Jean. I guess it was wishful thinking on my end. Then, you kids wouldn't need to make this choice."

Mom frowned. "I don't think there's much of a choice to be made. You're all kids. There's a reason we don't allow people to enlist in the army until they're at least eighteen. Personally, I think that's too young. But, telling a small group of thirteen year olds that they're the only way to fight for the fate of the human race until, maybe, the Andalites return? Whenever that might be?" She shook her head. "It's wrong."

"Elfangor was dying," Tobias protested. "I'm sure that we weren't his first choice for fighting the Yeerks."

"I'd hope not," Tom practically growled. "He would have had to have some sick sense of humor."

I turned to Tom. "It was us or no one. As much as this sucks, I'm glad we actually had a chance to do some damage. Not to mention, rescue you from that slug."

Tom nodded, looking a little abashed, then wrapped an arm around me. "Yeah, Midget, I know. Just hate to think of you all nearly dying whenever you go on a mission. You're my baby brother."

I rolled my eyes. "I'm not a baby, Tom. I'm thirteen."

Tom raised his arms in mock surrender. "I take it back. You're a regular old man. In a year or so, once the Andalites have crushed the Yeerks, you'll be sitting outside your fancy mansion and yelling at the neighborhood kids to 'Get off my lawn!'"

That got a laugh from all of us, easing a little of the tension in the room.

"I'm with your mom," Dad added. "You're kids. I know you've done pretty amazing so far, but you shouldn't have to fight this war. Look, from what it sounds like, the Andalites either arrive too late, or they don't come at all. According to this Ellimist, at least. With that in mind, unless we're able to multiply the number of forces to fight the Yeerks, it's a losing battle."

I sighed, a little. This was a discussion we'd had before.

"We can't go to the police, or the military, or anyone. There's an extremely high chance that the Yeerks already got them. Even if they only got a small number of them...then, it's all over. And, we've just revealed ourselves and taken away any advantage we have," I explained, for probably the hundredth time.

"Midget's right. Mom, Dad, the only reason you guys know is because I knew for a fact that you weren't infested, and I barely escaped the Yeerk Pool. Otherwise..." Tom left the rest unsaid.

"I'm still not sure all of this secrecy is necessary, but that's a topic for another day," Dad sighed.

"No, it isn't. Because, they're taking this Ellimist up on his offer. We're going to leave for another planet, and save what remains we can of the human race, and our boys' innocence," Mom shot back.

"Mom," Tom pointed out, speaking way more diplomatically and reasonably than I could have hoped to, in the moment, "according to the Ellimist, it's just the six of them that have a vote." Looking at me, he added, "I'm not saying Mom's wrong. I think we should all get out of here while we still can. That being said, the choice isn't mine. Or Mom or Dad's. And, whatever you choose, we need to accept it."

Mom looked like she might either burst into tears or yell at Tom, but Dad took her hand in his, and she just nodded.

"Is there a deadline?" Tom asked us. "Like, should we start packing now, or can we wait until tomorrow?"

Tobias and I shrugged.

"Could be tomorrow. Could be next month," I admitted. "He wasn't big on details."

"Which means," Dad joked, "you kids still need to get your homework done in the meantime."

We gave good natured groans.

"Well, if there's no homework on the new planet, that's another reason to go," I half joked.

"Tell me about it," Tobias sighed. "I still have to get started on my history paper."

After dinner that night, I went back to the basement with Mom, as she was going to collect Tom's dinner dishes. All three of us watched TV for a little, and then she gave Tom a good night hug and a kiss on the top of the head.

Once she was out of earshot, Tom turned to me, concern etched in his face.

"How are you holding up, Jake?"

I had to shrug. "It's still a lot to take in. I just don't know what the right decision is. Not that I'm the only one making it. We'll need to get together tomorrow and talk. Probably, Ax will just go along with whatever I say, given that he thinks I'm his prince. I figure Rachel will vote to stay and fight. Marco will probably want to leave, if he knows that his Mom and dad will be there."

Tom was the only one, besides me, who knew the truth about Marco's mom. He'd asked me not to tell anyone else, but figured that as Tom was my brother and he might have seen her when he was infested, it was okay if she knew. I was glad. I would have kept it quiet, if he really didn't want Tom to know, but it would have been hard. I hadn't kept secrets from Tom before he was infested, and now that he was free again, I felt like he was the only person I could really turn to for advice that wasn't an Animorph.

"Yeah. The odds that Rachel will vote no are a million to one. No, make that a billion to one," Tom laughed. "What about Tobias and Cassie?"

I had to shrug. "Cassie's all about saving the planet, and Rachel's her best friend, so she could vote to fight. I'm not completely sure about Tobias, except I don't think he's completely convinced one way or the other. Not that any of us are, except Rachel. Probably."

"That's Xena for you," Tom smiled, wrapping an arm around me. "You can count on her to be in for a fight."

"I told you about what she did at the circus, didn't I?" I asked, settling in against my brother, while keeping my face towards his.

"Circus?" Tom echoed.

I gave him the whole story about the elephant and the cattle prod. We were both laughing so hard by the end that I had tears running down my face, and Tom was gasping for breath.

"Oh, man. You have to remember to tell me stuff like that in the future, okay? Promise me. I know there's a lot of doom and gloom, but it's that kind of thing that you're going to need to remember when you write this all down," Tom practically wheezed.

"I promise," I agreed, not mentioning that there might not be a book if we went off to a distant planet.

We were quiet for awhile, just watching some news story on the TV. Something about a fire in another part of the state. Thankfully, no one was injured, and it had taken place in an abandoned building. It wasn't like a family had lost their home or anything like that.

I was starting to get tired, though. It had been a very weird day, to put it mildly, and even though I was sure I'd have nightmares that night about being inside of a Taxxon, I couldn't put off sleep indefinitely.

Especially when Tom caught me attempting to hide my third yawn.

"Think I'm going to turn in," I told him, a few minutes later. Then, without giving myself a chance to talk myself out of it, I asked, "Hey, Tom? Do you mind if I stay with you tonight?"

I hadn't done so in a few weeks. After the nightly nightmares of my three days as Temrash's slave and personal punching bag dropped off to just once a week. Tom had insisted I stay with him during that time, and I hadn't needed much convincing.

Still. I didn't want to seem like a baby, running to my older brother whenever I had a bad dream.

I was sure he still had plenty of those, and he wasn't complaining.

Tom's face sort of softened, and he looked...almost relieved.

"Of course I don't mind, Midget. I've missed our sleepovers." Then, teasingly, he added, "Not so much your snoring."

I rolled my eyes at him. "I don't snore."

"Yeah, you do. I keep telling you, give me the tape recorder, and I'll prove it," he promised.

"Not gonna happen," I insisted.

He grinned. "Well, you'll have to trust me, then. You snore. Not like a raging boar or anything, but there's noise that comes out of your mouth when you sleep. Which is known as snoring."

I glared at him, but we both knew I wasn't serious. After a pause, I added, "You really don't mind?"

"The snoring?" Tom rolled his eyes at me. "I just told you I don't."

"No...I mean, me sleeping next to you. Especially since I get nightmares, and wake you up," I explained.

Tom sighed, then placed a hand on my shoulder. "We're brothers, Midget. More than that, I'm your older brother. If I can't physically kick Visser Three's butt for you, I sure as hell can be there for you when you have a nightmare."

I nodded. "I don't get them that often, usually. Just around once a week."

"That's good," Tom answered, encouragingly. "Look, I know you'll probably get one tonight, but you're more than welcome to spend the night when you don't have anything life threatening going on."

"Really?"

Tom rolled his eyes at me, and sighed. "Yes, really. In case you haven't noticed, I like having you around, and I'm sure that it will help you in the future if you have me by your side when you're not freaked out about possibly getting yourself killed."

I nodded. Then, something he said, or didn't say, sort of clicked.

"You get them, too."

Tom made a face...a pained face. "Yeah."

I swallowed hard. "Why didn't you tell me? Or Mom or Dad? You-you don't need to go through that alone."

The image of Tom waking up from a nightmare, reliving his experience with Temrash, and probably burying his head in the pillow so no one would hear him screaming...

I felt myself start to shake, again.

Tom pulled me into a hug. "That's part of the reason why I wanted you to keep sleeping down here. So that we could, you know, help each other deal with it."

Oh.

"I should have figured it out," I admitted, my face in his shoulder. "It's not like it takes a genius to know that you're going to..."

Tom squeezed me tighter for a few seconds, and then, we both let go.

"Yeah, well. I was trying, really hard, not to make things more difficult for you, or Mom and Dad," he explained. "Especially after you went through...what you did."

I shook my head. "Tom, you've been through something worse than almost anyone in the world can imagine. You don't need to...to hide it. Even if we're still fighting, it's not like I want you to keep it bottled up to protect me, or anything."

Tom nodded, then swallowed. "Yeah, you're right. Okay, once you guys figure out what's going to happen next, I'll talk to them."

"Promise?" I pressed.

"Cross my heart and all of that," Tom grinned. Then, he added, "Still want to sleep over tonight?"

If I'd had any doubts, especially about Tom not wanting me to stay, this took care of them.

"Definitely."

"Great. You head upstairs, and in about five minutes, I'll sneak upstairs to brush my teeth," Tom promised.

It was less risky this way. If someone saw Tom in the hallway or something, but they'd seen me a few minutes earlier, they could mistake us for the same person. Especially with Tom's hair a little longer, now.

I nodded, gave him another hug, and then headed upstairs to get changed, and all of that. While Tom was brushing his teeth in our bathroom, I headed to my parents' room to say goodnight. They were watching the news in their room, but Dad turned it down when I came in.

"Hey, kiddo," Dad greeted. "Everything okay?"

I shrugged. "It's a lot to take in, but we'll figure it out." I paused, then continued. "We all care about what you want, you know. We just-we need to make the right decision for humanity, and if there's a chance that we can hold out..."

Dad put a hand on my shoulder. "I know, Jake. Your mom and I talked, and we want you to know that we will respect whatever decision you make."

I swallowed, hard. "We might not need to make a decision for another year or so. It's not like he said when he'd be back. Who knows? Besides, maybe he thought we'd die in the Taxxon, and when we ended up living..."

Mom and Dad got out of bed and pulled me into a hug. It felt so nice, and I couldn't remember the last time they'd hugged me. Being a teenager, I'd thought I was too old for stuff like that. From my parents, anyway. Maybe, it was different when it was your older brother.

Who knows. Anyway, I hugged them back, and we stood like that until I was sure I was going to fall asleep right there. Sleeping next to your brother was one thing, but I really didn't want to wake up in my bed having been carried there by my mom or dad.

I let go first, and we all smiled. Nothing had changed, but we probably all felt a lot calmer, and knowing that we were all on the same side of things helped.

"I'm going to go to bed," I told them, hiding a yawn. "Well, I'm going to stay with Tom tonight, anyway."

My parents nodded, but I got the sense they were giving each other a knowing look.

"Jake, honey? How's he handling all of this?" Mom wondered.

"I guess, as well as he can," I hedged, not wanting to say them anything that Tom would want to tell them. "Well, good night."

"Sweet dreams, son," Dad smiled, putting a hand on my shoulder, briefly.

I had to laugh. "I'll settle for no nightmares."

Tom was back in the basement when I came down. He'd made up the couch bed, as he'd named it, with those fitted sheets over the cushions and another one under the three blankets. The basement was easily the coldest room in the house, so anyone who spent any length of time down there would be cold without a sweatshirt or something. Tom also pointed out that this made exercising a lot easier, with all of the air flow.

"Better hurry up before those feet of yours freeze," Tom warned, teasingly.

"First, I snore, now I have frozen feet?" I retorted, getting under the covers. "I don't know, Tom. You might prefer Homer over me."

Tom turned off the light, then wrapped his arms around me. "You don't smell. Much."

"Much?" I echoed.

"Midget, you did practically get eaten by a Taxxon," was my brother's oh so diplomatic rely.

"I morphed dog and, afterwards, I showered. There's no way I smell anymore," I complained.

Tom laughed. "Okay, you just have the ghost of a Taxxon smell."

I rolled my eyes, even though Tom couldn't see. "What's that?"

"It's like phantom pains, except it only affects others. And they have to know what happened. Duh," Tom explained, and I was sure he was rolling his eyes.

I smiled to myself. "How long will it stay with me?"

"For the rest of your life," Tom deadpanned.

"Maybe I should sleep in my own bed, then," I teased.

I felt Tom's grip on me tighten as he laughed. "Don't even think about it, Midget. You're stuck with me."

I squirmed as my ability to breathe freely diminished. "Ouch! Okay, okay. Just let me breathe!"

Tom loosened his hold on me enough for me be able to inhale and exhale more or less on my own.

"Sorry." He ran a hand through my hair. "I didn't mean to hurt you, Jake."

I had to smile at this. "It's okay, Tom. You're just stronger than me."

"Physically, maybe," Tom allowed. "At the risk of sounding corny, inside, you're as tough as I am. Maybe tougher."

I shook my head and swallowed hard. "No way. You're tougher than I am."

I was pretty sure Tom knew what I meant. He sighed, ran a hand through my hair, gently.

"Doubt it, but it's not a competition," he allowed.

"Yeah, I know," I agreed.

He resumed his regular bear hug, and I nestled in close, enjoying the feel of his t-shirt on my face. The scent of my big brother, combined with the scent of laundry detergent Mom had used a day or so ago, felt so normal, so comfortable. Really, I would have felt completely safe, except I knew that nightmares would probably follow me that night.

Sure enough, a few hours later, I woke up screaming. In this nightmare, I was stuck inside of the Taxxon, again, and then, I was a Controller, infesting a terrified and screaming Tom. Two voices laughed in the distance, Visser Three, and the Ellimist. The slug had just started to enter Tom's ear when I woke up.

"Hey...shh...it's just a dream, Jake," Tom soothed.

I must have started thrashing, because Tom removed the blankets from my body, and half lifted me into a sitting position on the couch. He knew the drill all too well by now. A minute later, he'd turned on the light on the table next to the couch. Then, just as he'd done so many times before when I'd been dealing with the aftermath of my infestation, his hands were on my back, massaging my shoulders in comforting circles.

I forced myself to take several deep breaths, to remember where I was.

"Hey, Midget? Do you want to talk about it?" Tom asked, his voice soft. Gentle.

"I was back in the Taxxon, and then I was infesting you." My voice was shaky. "Visser Three and the Ellimist were laughing."

Tom sighed. "Yeah. I figured it would be something like that. With all that happened, earlier, and what we talked about."

I turned around to face him. "It could all happen. Maybe not the Ellimist laughing part, but everything else. That's the worst part. I don't want to get you killed, or infested. I don't want to become a Controller again, and I really don't want to die..."

Tom wrapped his arms around me. Tight and secure. "I know, Jake. Whenever you go on a mission, I worry that it's the last time I'll see you alive."

I swallowed, hard. "If we're gonna lose either way, why are we putting ourselves through this? It would be one thing if we actually stood a chance of winning. But, we're just kids. Kids who can turn into dangerous animals, sure, but there's only six of us. Against millions of Yeerks."

It all felt so hopeless. Really, the only thing of any significance that we'd done-besides saving Tom, and that was only significant to the five people in my family-was preventing the clinic from opening. That had been a victory, sure, but it was only a temporary setback for the Yeerks. They'd lost maybe a couple of hundred Yeerks and a building. And that particular chance at infesting the governor. Big deal. He might not even become the president. Maybe, they'd just infest the current one, instead, or even the VP. The Sharing had connections everywhere.

We didn't even have driver's licenses.

"Yeah," Tom agreed, slowly, "you're not wrong. The thing is, how much does this Ellimist really know? He says that you'll lose, but I don't think he's God. Maybe, he can see some possible futures. Big freaking deal. Any one of us can imagine that. You know, I don't think he can know what's gonna happen any more than any one of us."

"He froze time, Tom," I argued. "He's more than a little advanced than the rest of us. Even Ax admitted that his powers were greater than Andalites."

"Okay, so he's the next stage in whatever evolution there is after the great and powerful Andalites. Who, by the way, are clearly not kicking Yeerk butt. Anyway, I still think this Ellimist creature could be wrong about the future," Tom insisted.

"Yeah. Maybe," I allowed.

Then, I yawned. Even though I really didn't want to go back to bed.

Tom studied me. "Want to talk some more? Or, try to get some more sleep?" After a silence, he added, "Hey, you never get more than one nightmare a night. Maybe your next dream will feature you as your Homer morph, running around in a big field and playing fetch."

I had my doubts on the dog morph dream, but I knew that Tom was right about me never having more than one nightmare in the span of one night. I guessed I was lucky that way.

Anyway, as the moments passed, I felt like fighting sleep would be a losing battle. So, I just nodded my head, and Tom tucked me in as though I were five years old and he was my Dad. Not that I was complaining. It was nice, being taken care of. Tom never even ribbed me about it, so he clearly enjoyed this as well. Once again, I let my head rest against his chest, enjoying the feel of my big brother's arms wrapped around me. He'd always protected me, and I knew that he would continue to do so-at least, as much as he could.

I don't remember what I dreamed, or if I dreamed. Just that I didn't have any other nightmares that night.

The Ellimist came back a few days later to show us a future where we'd lost, with our school building in disuse, and the skeleton of one of our teacher's hanging in one of the classrooms. Some big red bulb was hanging from the EGS tower, but none of us knew what it was.

We probably would have all voted then and there to give up the fight, except for the future Rachel slipped up on recognizing Ax, and she made a comment about eating Tobias in bird morph. We figured out pretty quick that this so-called future was a fake, which made us wonder if anything the Ellimist said-at least, about the inevitability of us losing-was even remotely true.

After we were back in our normal time, gathered at my house and eating pizza that my parents had ordered for us, Marco was the one who figured out that the red bulb on the tower matched the one that we saw just before we were about to be devoured by the Taxxon.

"Wait. A bright red bulb?" Tom asked, holding his slice of pizza mid air. "How big? The size of a car, or like an oversized light bulb?"

I stared at him. Well, we probably all stared at him, but I wasn't looking at my friends in that moment.

"Closer to the car. Why?" I wondered.

Tom laughed, then slightly slapped me on the back. "Congratulations, Midget. You just found where they keep their Kandrona."

"Are you kidding me?" Rachel demanded, placing her piece of pizza down on her plate.

Tom nodded, then shook his head. "I'm not kidding, Rachel. Believe me, I wouldn't kid about something like that."

"How do you know?" Marco asked him. "Your slug...he didn't...?"

"He wasn't a specialist or anything, but he was there overseeing it when it was installed. Did a lot of yelling, too. It was the first time I went to feed already having a sore throat beforehand," Tom remembered, making a face. "He was really happy about that."

"Filthy Yeerk," Ax spat out.

He was in his human morph, and had devoured an entire pizza on his own in about five minutes. Good thing my parents had been warned in advance, and ordered extra.

Tom nodded his head in agreement. "Sounds to me like all of this hassle about taking you to another planet was just a guise for the Ellimist to show you where the Kandrona is."

I had to laugh. "So much for not interfering."

Rachel frowned to herself, then smiled. "My history teacher was telling us earlier about how a butterfly flapping its wings could change start an earthquake or something on another continent. Just by beating its wings. Small things like that can be the trigger for major results."

"I wouldn't say that destroying a Kandrona is a small thing," Tom pointed out. "But, maybe, you seeing where it was is the whole 'butterfly flapping its wings' part in this war."

"Could be," Marco agreed, taking a huge bite of pizza.

"Now," Rachel added, with a fierce look in her eyes, "we just have to demolish it."

"Battle morphs?" Tobias asked me.

Before I could answer, Rachel spoke up.

"I've got the perfect morph for it."

We ended up deciding that the super early hours of the morning would be the best time for Rachel to smash the Kandrona to bits, and the rest of us would be there to fight whatever guards were there. I wasn't dumb enough to think that there wouldn't be any.

After a series of lies to their parents about spending the night at each other's houses (another reason I was glad that my parents knew the truth and Tom was on our side), we all ended up staying at my house and setting the various alarms for 2:30AM. At least, we'd get a few hours of sleep before the mission.

Hopefully.

It went better than I could have expected, but Rachel was the real star. That Kandrona smashed on the pavement several stories down, and just as we started to celebrate, the Ellimist appeared.

Of course.

Tom was there, this time. I guessed the Ellimist felt it to be the polite thing to include him.

The bad news was that there was another Kandrona on the way, due to arrive in about three weeks. The good news was that, with the only other Kandrona on the Yeerk blade ship, there was no way Visser Three would have the resources to cart off every single Controller every three days to get the necessary Kandrona rays.

Even though we didn't see the damage at first, we later learned just how much damage we'd done. Partly due to the help of a Yeerk who had a personal vendetta against Visser Three, because he hadn't chosen his girlfriend (Yeerkfriend? Whatever term they used for Yeerks in that kind of a relationship) to live.

In the end, we kicked serious butt.

Not that we knew any of this right away. I just figured, as Tom and Tobias and I made our way back to our house in the super early hours of the morning, ready to get a few more hours of sleep, that we might actually have a chance of holding off the Yeerks until the Andalites arrived.

Curled up against Tom on his bed, I felt proud of myself.

So was he.

"That was incredible, Midget," he praised, and I could hear the smile in his voice.

I shrugged. "You and Rachel did most of the work, figuring everything out."

"Sure, but you guys are a team, and you're the leader. That gives you a ton of credit by default," he insisted.

I shrugged, again. "Sure you're not a little biased because you're my older brother?"

He laughed. "So what if I am? Anyway, you totally kicked Visser Three in the nuts. Metaphorically speaking. Man, I do not want to be there when he finds out the truth."

"Heads will roll," I agreed.

"Yep. Hork-Bajir and Taxxon heads will follow that Kandrona right out of the broken window," Tom laughed.

"He's not that stupid," I objected.

Tom snickered. "Probably not, but it's still fun to imagine."

"I'm more looking forward to seeing all of the freed Controllers walking around and telling the cops and the news. They won't be able to keep this a secret forever, right?" I asked.

Tom seemed to consider this. "Well, Visser Three's not gonna just lay down and take it. Still, this could be a turning point. We'll just have to wait and see."

I yawned. "And get some sleep in the meantime. Hopefully, without nightmares."

I felt Tom nod. "Speaking of which..."

"Yeah, I know. Good night, Tom. See you in a few hours."

"Sweet dreams." Tom held me closer to him. "Seriously. Relive that giant hell ball crashing on the pavement, Midget. Because, soon enough, that will represent the whole empire, crashing down."

The aftermath wasn't as simple as that, which we soon learned. Even so, we did do more than a little damage to Visser Three.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've been able to get a lot of writing done over the last few months due to both of my workplaces being shut down due to covid-19. While everyone remained employed during this time, most of us weren't expected to work our usual day. Which meant more time to write. As things are opening up again, including both of my jobs, my writing time will be more limited. This chapter was the last one I wrote while things were closed. So, if my writing is more sporadic, that's part of the reason why!
> 
> The next chapter might end up being a combo of books 9 and 10. Of course, I want to cover Tom's reaction to skunk!Cassie spraying Visser Three, but there's considerably more meat in book 10 than book 9.


	5. Chapter 5

"You're kidding."

"I swear, Tom, I'm not."

"I don't believe you."

My kid brother grinned. "I wouldn't have either, but I smelled him afterwards."

"Midget, there's no way she would still be alive..."

Another grin.

"We told him we knew how to get the smell out. Ax-man was especially convincing. Said that the smell would remain in the blade ship forever if he got in there."

"Was he bluffing? He had to be."

Jake shrugged. "I'm not sure Ax knew either way, to be honest. But it worked."

I shook my head. "Man. This is the kind of thing I miss. Cassie as a skunk spraying Visser Three. Cassie! As a SKUNK! Spraying Visser Three!"

Jake grinned. "It was pretty incredible."

"Did you guys tell him how to get the smell out? Please tell me you didn't," I begged.

We were sitting on the couch in the basement, of course. Everyone was there, but it was just me and Jake who were doing the talking. Tobias had witnessed the event, and they'd told my parents earlier. They had these looks on their faces where...you know when your kid is being bullied and they finally punch the bully? And you don't know whether to ground or kid or give them a reward? That's basically how my parents looked.

Plus, you know, barely hidden amusement that Midget's sort of girlfriend had sprayed the most feared and hated alien overlord in the galaxy...as a skunk.

"We told him to take a bath in grape juice," Midget explained, still smiling his face off.

"Which means, the next time you see him, he'll be purple and just as smelly!" I chortled. "Oh, man. I hope that, somewhere, there's a tape of this. Probably not, but this is just too great not to go unrecorded for all of history. I mean, Jake, once you defeat the Yeerks and do your biography, you will have to devote at least a chapter to this mission."

Tobias grinned. "That would be something the publishers would promote to get people to buy copies. Learn how the Animorphs worked with the Andalites to save the world...and managed to skunk spray Visser Three along the way."

We all burst out laughing then, including my parents.

Good. Things had been way too serious since the whole logging mission started. Not only did Jake and his friends officially win this one, they had bragging rights as to why he smelled like skunk.

That was a definite win for everyone, this time.

"What I don't get," my dad asked, once we'd calmed down, "is why he didn't just morph. Wouldn't the smell vanish as soon as his body changed?"

Jake furrowed his brow in concentration. "I get the idea that he sees morphing as more of a way to inflict harm on others than get out of problems."

Tobias nodded. "When Ax poisoned him as a snake, Visser Three left his host and the Yeerks had to go off in search of some antidote. He told me that Alloran was too weak to do much aside from beg for Ax to..."

"Not to kill him?" I asked, gently.

"No. To kill him," Tobias answered, face tightening. "But, Ax couldn't. Not without the Yeerk being there."

Yeah. This was weird. Plus, there was the whole issue of Elfangor having enough energy and concentration to be able to explain Yeerks and morphing to Jake and his friends, but not focus enough on any kind of animal so his injuries could vanish.

Clearly, Andalites didn't see morphing the way we did.

Given how many times Midget and his friends almost died, this was a very good thing.

"That's good," I finally spoke up. "Visser Three's a complete maniac, but he's losing to you guys. Whatever you're doing, you should keep it up. Besides, this means that his host still has the hope of being freed one day. Everyone who's being enslaved by those slugs deserves that hope."

Midget squeezed my hand, tightly.

I, of course, squeezed back.

"I think this calls for ice cream," Dad announced. "Tom? You up for some?"

"Always up for ice cream," I laughed. "We still got mint chocolate chip?"

"Just bought a container last week," Mom promised, with a smile.

So, when Mom and Dad and Tobias went upstairs to get the ice cream ready, Jake stayed downstairs with me.

Of course, I gave him only the tenth hug that day.

And Jake rolled his eyes, but squeezed me back, just as tightly.

"I worry about you, Midget," I told him. "But, I'm glad everything went as well as it did."

"Me too, Tom," my brother answered, with a relieved smile. 

"How many missions has that been so far? Like, twenty?" I pressed, wrapping an arm around him.

Jake rested his head against me. "Ten, I think."

I held him close. "You need a break."

"We still have to be skunk parents for the next few days," Jake reminded me. "Good thing that's pretty low risk."

I rolled my eyes. "Can't believe Cassie convinced you to do this."

"They are pretty cute," Jake laughed.

"Yeah, well. If you get sprayed..."

"I know, Tom." He rolled his eyes at me. "Don't use grape juice."

I gave him a little nudge. "Use morphing, instead."

A few moments later, the rest of the family arrived with the ice cream. I kept one arm around Jake as we ate, and soon afterwards, he took a long nap next to me.

It had been, for him, a long but good day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter, but I figured this kind of got to the meat of the Tom and Jake interactions of it. At least, as far as the two of them would be involved. It was a Cassie book, after all. Now, the next chapter will be somewhat of a turning point for Tom's life. Let's just say he'll be getting a lot back.

**Author's Note:**

> In this version, a few obvious points from the series have changed. Obviously, Tom is freed in the first book. Since we don't have the Chee or the Peace Movement, he has to remain in hiding for the near future. Likewise, he can't become an Animorph (yet) because they don't have the blue box. Also, Tobias doesn't become a nothlit. In fact, I have plans for him that will be revealed in the next chapter that will result in his home life being a LOT happier. Any guesses? (Hint: Check the tags!)


End file.
